Definitely Well, Maybe
by This Calls For More Glitter
Summary: Rachel's daughter asks her mom who her dad is, so Rachel tells her about the men that had been in her life, asking her daughter to guess which one is her dad. Inspired by Definitely, Maybe. Finchel, Samchel, Puckleberry and St. Berry. Rating may go up.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: Never will I ever own Glee. I don't own Definitely, Maybe either.

Author's Note: Hola faithful readers! It's Jackie, back again with another story! I know this idea has been done lots of other times, but I assure you I am trying to make it as original as possible. Please review, I'll try to write again once I get three reviews on this chapter. All of the parts that take place in the future are in normal, all the flashbacks are _italics_ and all songs are **bold**. Enjoy! ~Jackie

* * *

><p>It's no secret that my life didn't turn out how I planned. Living in New York City with a beautiful eleven year old daughter and coaching a glee club wasn't exactly what I had thought I'd be doing. But my life with my daughter, Ava Barbra Berry, was as close to perfect as it could get. Ava reminded me so much of myself, from her looks to her voice to her personality. It had always been just the two of us, but we liked it that way. At least I thought we did. Until that damn school made Ava have her first sex ed lesson.<p>

We just been sitting on the couch, watching _Funny Girl _for what felt like the millionth time, when she looked up at me. "If it takes a man and a woman to have a baby, how did Grandpa and Granddaddy have you? And how did Uncle Kurt and Uncle Blaine have Autumn?"

I paused the movie and looked to my daughter, who was curled up against my side, her arms wrapped around one of the pillows. "Well, Grandpa and Granddaddy had someone carry me for them. Uncle Kurt and Uncle Blaine did the same thing."

"So I have a grandmother?" Ava asked. "How come I've never met her."

_That _was a hard question to answer. "Well, sweetie…Grandma and I aren't exactly on good terms. I went through sixteen years of my life not knowing who she was and she never tried to have a relationship with me. It just hurt my feelings a little bit. I felt like I wasn't good enough."

Now Ava sat up straight, her lower lip jutted out. "So then why are you letting me go my whole life not knowing my dad if you went through the same thing with your mom?"

"Oh, Ava-"

"Don't 'Oh Ava' me!" She said in a tone that was an exact copy of my own. "How can you let me never know who he was? How come I have to go my life feeling like I wasn't good enough for him?"

I pulled Ava closer and kissed her forehead. "Sweetie, he loved you. We loved you. Never doubt that."

"It's just, everyone else has someone." Ava stammered. "Uncle Kurt has Uncle Blaine. Aunt Santana has Aunt Brittany. Aunt Quinn has that long distance boyfriend she always talks about. How come you don't have anyone?"

I shrugged. "I've been in love before. Your father and I just didn't work out." I put Ava's face in my hands and kissed her nose. "Tell you what? I'm going to tell you who your father is."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. Except, I'm not going to tell you flat out. You have to guess. In my whole life, I've been in love with four people. They're all in the story, and you have to guess who is your dad. Sound like a plan?"

Ava nodded eagerly. "Yes! I'm so happy! I'm finally going to find out who my dad is!"

"Go get in your pajamas, and I'll come to start the story in a minute."

Ava quickly hugged me before running to her room. I sighed to myself as I turned off the TV and then went to finish the dinner dishes.

I knew telling this story wouldn't be easy. Whenever I thought of these four guys, the loves of my life, I always wondered about what could've been.

_What if I hadn't cheated?_

_What if I hadn't chosen one of them? _

_What if I had made my choice sooner? _

_What if I hadn't gotten married?_

_What if I had married someone else? _

…_What if Ava had never been born?_

I erased the last thought from my mind. I loved Ava more than anything. And sometimes I did miss her father, sometimes I wished he was there to see his daughter, to see how beautiful she was.

I closed the dish washer and dried my hands with a towel. No, he had chosen to leave his wife and baby. He had asked for the divorce. I hadn't forced him. That's why I had changed Ava's last name. It was his loss.

"Are you coming, Mom?" I heard Ava call from her room.

"Just a second, Ava." I replied, turning off the lights in the kitchen and family room, mentally preparing myself for a grueling trip down memory lane.

* * *

><p>Review?<p> 


	2. A Little More Than Comfort

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Author's Note: Review? You're doing great so far! I'll try to update once I get five reviews on this chapter. ~Jackie

* * *

><p>When I entered Ava's room, she was sitting on her bed in her pajamas, looking at me expectantly.<p>

"Come on!" She said. "I want to hear the story!"

I smiled at her and sat down. Ava picked a notebook and her favorite purple pen off her nightstand, smiling back. "Go on, I'm listening." She sounded eager.

I leaned back against the headboard, thinking back. I couldn't tell Ava exactly what happened, I wanted to keep it PG. I'd have to stretch the truth a little. "The story starts with me doing something I regret to this very day, the end of one romance, yet only the beginning of so many others…"

* * *

><p><em>So, I had been crying... I had been crying a lot, actually. I had just found out my boyfriend was enlisting in the army, and he hadn't bothered to tell me. I couldn't help myself from just sitting on the floor, putting my head in my hands, and weeping. <em>

_That year was supposed to be about us. We had promised that year we would have no drama, and yet there I was, bawling my eyes out. He had made such a big decision, without telling me. He was going, and I didn't want him to. _

"_Rachel?" _

_I looked up. Standing there was Sam Evans…_

* * *

><p>"Wait!" Ava interrupted. "Is Sam one of the four?"<p>

I nodded. "He is."

"Is he my father?"

I couldn't help but laugh at my daughter's straightforwardness. "Is that your final answer? ...Well, maybe. May I continue?"

Ava scribbled something down in her notebook. "Yes. I need to gather clues about this Sam."

* * *

><p>"<em>Go away, Sam!" I had snapped at him, wiping my eyes in hope he wouldn't see my tears. "Please just go away!" <em>

_Sam didn't go away, instead he sat down beside me on the hallway floor. "Shouldn't you be in glee club? We've been looking everywhere for you! Finn was so worried-"_

"_No…well, yes I should. But I don't want to be." I interrupted. "I can't see Finn, not right now." _

_Sam's face fell. "This is about the army, isn't it? You're sad he's leaving?" _

* * *

><p>"Wait!" Ava interjected again.<p>

"What is it now, Ava Bear?" I teased.

"This Finn, he's one of the four too? You said he was your boyfriend, right?" Ava asked. "Was he one of the men you loved?"

I opened my mouth, but the sound caught in my throat. "Yes." I said, biting my lip and trying to force myself not to smile. "Yes, I was deeply, irrevocably in love with him."

"Does that mean Finn's my dad?" I asked. "You said you were in love with him forever!"

"I was in love with him," I sighed. "I was. Definately."

Ava placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry Mommy, you must've really cared about him. Can you continue with the story?"

* * *

><p>"<em>Did everyone know about this before me?" I sobbed. <em>

_Sam pulled me into a hug. "Please don't cry Rachel. I don't like it when you cry." _

_I looked up at him, studying his face. At that moment, he looked so handsome, so…loveable. I felt like I couldn't resist him. "Do you want to make me feel better, Sam?" _

"_Yes, I care about you Rachel and...want you to be happy." He breathed, before bending down and-_

* * *

><p>I stopped there, remembering I had to keep it PG for Ava. But my daughter had already begun to speak.<p>

"You had sex with him."

"Ava!" I gasped. "What are they teaching you at that school of yours?"

"That is so a yes," Ava said, writing something down in her notebook. "Had sex with Mom." She read aloud as she wrote.

I rolled my eyes and snorted. "Good thing is you're mature." I glanced at the clock. "I think it's past your bedtime, young lady!"

Ava giggled, she liked being called a 'young lady' and she climbed under the sheets. I kissed her temple and she hugged me. "I love you, Mom."

"Love you, Ava Bear."

I smiled as I watched my daughter curl up in her blankets and wrapp her arms around her favorite teddy bear, Dreamer, a gift from her dad she received when she was born. It had bubblegum pink fur and held a little gold star in its fluffy paw, because her dad had known how much I loved them and had wanted our daughter to love gold stars too.

As I turned out the light, I longed for Ava to have a father figure for the first time since he left.

* * *

><p>Review? Please?<p> 


	3. Be Strong

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or Definitely, Maybe.

Author's Note: Please review. I will update once I receive six reviews on this chapter, so if you want me to update I suggest you review. I am not happy when I don't get reviews! ~Jackie

* * *

><p>The next morning, I was making some vegan muffins for breakfast and thinking back to the story, thinking about Sam.<p>

* * *

><p><em>The morning after, we had been lying next to each other, naked under the sheets of the motel room, hands roaming and kissing when I sat up promptly. <em>

"_What have I done?" I asked, throwing the sheets off myself and jumping off. _

"_Rachel," Sam just said my name in a sexy way, making me go back to kiss him once more before heading back towards the bathroom. "You have a great body," He teased. _

_I laughed and made a silly pose before running into the bathroom and taking a shower, finally absorbing the awful things I'd done. I began to realize that I could never tell Finn about this, or risk losing him forever. _

* * *

><p>That's when Ava shuffled down the stairs.<p>

"Morning sleepyhead," I teased playfully. "Did the princess get plenty of beauty sleep?"

Ava walked over and looked up with me with her big brown eyes. "Did you love Sam?"

I was a little surprised by the question. It was like she was reading my thoughts. "Definitely…well, maybe."

"Can you tell me some more of the story today?" Ava asked. "I still want to know the other two guys that could possibly be my dad."

"Sure honey," I said. "Why don't we have some breakfast and I can try to fit some in before Uncle Kurt and Uncle Blaine come to get you." Kurt had made it a tradition for him and Blaine to take Ava out shopping one Saturday of every month, because they did not trust me to dress her myself with my "horrid" sense of style.

Ava nodded eagerly before sitting down at her seat in the kitchen. I placed the plate of muffins in the center of the table and poured orange juice for Ava and a piping hot cup of coffee for me (I was going to need it, I was monitoring Saturday detention while Ava was out with Kurt and Blaine).

"Alright," I said. "Where did I leave off?"

"You and Sam,"

"Oh, how could I forget?" I hit my tongue on the roof of my mouth, making a little clucking sound.

* * *

><p>"<em>Hey Rachel, Finn's looking for you!" <em>

_It was a week later, and I had been at my locker when Puck had told me Finn was trying to find me. _

"_Thanks Noah," I had said, feeling my stomach drop. Did Finn know about…what I did?_

_I found Finn waiting for me in the choir room. "Hey beautiful," He smiled and I breathed a sigh of relief. At least he wasn't angry. _

"_What's up, baby?" I asked, giving him a kiss on the cheek. _

"_I have something really important to say to you. It couldn't wait." Finn explained nervously. "I know you're so upset about me joining the army and…I just want you to know that I love you and I want to be with you. I want us to be together forever, I feel like we're almost…two halves of the same person." I giggled and he smiled. "Cheesy, I know. So, Rachel Berry, will you-"_

* * *

><p>The doorbell rang, interrupting my story. With a sigh (not only because of the disruption, but because of how this part of the story made me feel so god-awful) I got up to answer the door.<p>

Kurt and Blaine were standing outside, their three month old daughter Autumn in Kurt's arms. I pushed a dark curl off the baby's forehead and kissed her there, she gurgled happily and smiled wide.

"It feels like it's been forever since I've seen you!" Kurt admitted.

"It's been two weeks," I laughed.

Kurt gave me a look that read "do not correct me" and so I put my hands up in surrender.

"Where's Ava?" Blaine asked.

"Having breakfast," I replied. The two turned towards my kitchen, but I stuck my arm out to prevent them from moving any further and they both shrunk back. "But, can I tell you guys something first?"

"Anything!" Both said at the same time.

I played with a strand of my hair and lowered my eyes so I was looking at the floor. "Ava asked me about her dad,"

Blaine's eyes widened and Kurt raised a hand to his mouth in surprise. "You're telling her everything? About…_them_? Puck and Sam and Jesse and Finn?" The latter gasped.

I nodded. "Yes, I just got to the part where…he…" I choked on the words and let out something between a wail and a sob.

"Don't cry, sweetheart." Blaine soothed. "When we take Ava out, I want you to try and compose yourself. This is going to be just as hard as it is for you as it is for her. I'd say just forget the whole thing, but she has a right to know."

"Thanks," I said, blowing my bangs out of my eyes. "I need to have a little time for myself, away from all the stress and such."

"The life of any young mother is hard," Kurt said sympathetically as Ava came bounding into the room, having dressed hastily in one of her cute little dresses, a pink one with a ribbon covered in bunnies for trim. "How are you Ava?" He asked the young girl.

"Good Uncle Kurt, and glad to see you!" Ava replied, hugging Kurt before doing the same with Blaine. "Hi Uncle Blaine."

My two friends hugged tightly before ushering my daughter out the door. "Be strong," Kurt whispered into my ear as we embraced. "You can do this,"

I nodded, biting my lip, because for the first time in a long time I've started to doubt myself.

* * *

><p>Review? Praise? Complaints? Predictions? Ideas? Anything? Anything at all?<p> 


	4. If You Love Someone

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or the movie this fic is based off of, Definitely, Maybe.

Author's Note: Eight reviews on the last chapter! Yay! Think we can get ten this time? I will update after I get at least seven. I would love to know who you think Ava's dad is. So, review! ~Jackie

* * *

><p>When Ava came home that night, I was exhausted. After my long day, I wanted nothing more than to fall into bed and sleep for hours. But Ava refused.<p>

"Why won't you let Mommy sleep?" I asked her as we sat on her bed. I was brushing her hair and Ava was holding Dreamer against her chest.

"Because you were just getting to the good part." She answered. "Dreamer and I want to hear what Finn had to say to you!"

I laughed. "Well, I couldn't let dreamer down could I? Now, hold onto your pigtails Miss Ava, because you will not believe what happened next!"

Ava grinned. "Go on, Mom."

* * *

><p>"<em>I have something really important to say to you. It couldn't wait." Finn explained nervously. "I know you're so upset about me joining the army and…I just want you to know that I love you and I want to be with you. I want us to be together forever, I feel like we're almost…two halves of the same person." I giggled and he smiled. "Cheesy, I know. So, Rachel Berry, will you…will you marry me?"<em>

* * *

><p>"What?" Ava gasped. "He asked you to marry him?"<p>

I nodded. "Yes. Yes he did."

"Then does that mean Finn is my dad? You and my dad were married weren't you?"

"We were."

"So then is Finn my dad?" My daughter asked, I could hear the excitement in her voice.

"Is that your final answer?" I questioned. "You still have two more candidates to go."

"Err, no." Ava admitted. "Keep going? I'll try not to interrupt this time."

* * *

><p><em>In that moment, Finn standing before me and asking me to spend the rest of my life with him, our hands intertwined, I could practically hear my heart beating. I wanted to scream "yes" at the top of my lungs, I knew this might be my last chance to become Mrs. Finn Hudson. But then I thought of Sam, and our night together, and I knew…I knew what had to be done. <em>

"_No," I said, my voice shaking. "I can't." _

* * *

><p>"No!"<p>

I looked at my daughter, for had turned around so she was looking right at me with her wide eyes. "I thought you said you weren't going to interrupt me!"

"But you told him no!" Ava said. "I thought you loved him! How could you have no you wouldn't marry him if you wanted to?"

"Because," I replied. "Because…well, I'll tell you why."

* * *

><p><em>Finn's face fell. "What?"<em>

_I knew I had just crushed him. He had told me how he felt, how much he loved me, and I had shot him down. _

"_I want to," I explained. "You know I would love to marry you, Finn. I love you, I always have." _

"_Is this because of how young we are?" He asked. "Because I will wait for you. I'd wait a thousand years to marry you if I could." _

"_No," I said. "It's because…because I cheated on you."_

"_What? With who?" _

_Tears were streaming down my face. "Sam Evans."_

_Finn went pale. "Why?" He asked. _

"_Why what?" I choked on my words. _

"_Why would you do this to me?" _

"_I don't know." I sobbed. _

"_No, I think you do know." Finn said coldly. "Why did you do this?" _

_I thought for a second. "Because I was afraid of losing you. I was so scared, Finn. That you would go to the army and never come back. Sam was there, he offered and I accepted." I wiped at my eyes. "I can't marry you, because I know you deserve better than me. And if I really love you, I'll let you go."_

"_But I don't want you to let me go." He responded, his voice much softer than it had been a moment ago, childlike. _

"_Let. Me. Go." I said, enunciating so that it sounded like each word was a different sentence. "That's an order. Go. " _

_For once, Finn did exactly as he was told. All he left behind him was the engagement ring, which fell to the floor with a clatter. And then I just let tears overcome me. _

* * *

><p>"Mommy," Ava said. "That's so sad." Her eyes were glistening.<p>

"Honey, don't cry." I rubbed her eyes. "I hate it when you cry,"

"I don't like it when you cry either." Ava answered, twirling her hair. "Can you keep going, if we promise not to cry?"

I nodded. "Of course."

* * *

><p><em>I went to the auditorium. I sat on the stage, where Finn and I had kissed for the first time. I tried to stop my tears, but I just couldn't. The emotions I was feeling were so complicated, sadness, anger, love, regret…I felt like a wreck.<em>

"_Are you crying?" _

_I looked up. Standing there was Puck, Finn's best friend who had told me he was looking for me earlier. _

"_Get lost, Noah." I hissed as he sat down next to me. _

"_Why are you crying?" Puck just asked._

"_It's nothing," _

"_You and I went out," Puck stated. "I know when you're upset,"_

"_Finn asked me to marry him," I confessed. _

_Puck's eyes practically bulged right out of his head and his mouth was so wide, it was like he could use it to catch flies. _

"_He didn't tell you?" _

_Puck shook his head. "No."_

_I held my face in my hands. "Puck, I had sex with Sam." _

"_Oh." Puck sighed. "You and Trouty Mouth. Didn't see that one coming. Was Finn pissed?" _

_I half-laughed, half-cried. "Yes. I told him he deserved better than me."_

"_Don't you love him?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_Then go get him back." _

_I stood up. "I can't do that."_

_Puck shrugged_. "_I guess you're right. You know what they say. 'If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they're yours. If they don't, they were never yours to begin with'." _

* * *

><p>"I have a question," Ava said.<p>

"What is it?" I asked.

"Is Puck one of the four?"

"…Yes."

* * *

><p>Review?<p> 


	5. Ava's Dream

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Okay? Nothing.

Author's Note: Oh, so close! Nine reviews! I would've updated sooner, but I had to go to camp all weekend and I just got back less than an hour ago. I wrote this chapter when I was gone and I hope you like it, because all I had for inspiration was a bible, a bunch of snow and some trees. Not the best thing to pull inspiration from, but I think this chapter is arguably the best so far. This chapter will be entirely in present time (well, technically the future, but you know what I mean) and have a touch of Pezberry friendship. Once again, seven reviews get you an update. ~Jackie

* * *

><p>Ava flipped over the notebook page writing "Puck" at the top in big, bubble letters. Then she wrote "If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they're yours. If they don't, they were never yours to begin with," below that before looking up at me.<p>

"Don't stop now!" She said. "I want to hear about how you and Puck fell in love and what happened with Finn and more about Sam and who's the fourth person who might be my dad and-"

I cut Ava off. "Not tonight sweetie. It's past your bedtime, Ava."

My daughter moaned, but obediently crawled under the covers. "Night Mom."

"Goodnight Ava,"

"I love you Mom."

"Love you too, Ava." And then I turned out the light and shut the door.

I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep with all the thoughts whizzing in my brain, so I sat down on the couch and just…sat there, thinking, with my _Wicked_ soundtrack playing in the background. I was listening to one of Elphaba's solos (her voice sounded oddly familiar…) when the phone rang suddenly. I got up groggily and looked at the caller ID before answering.

"Santana Lopez, why are you calling me at eleven thirty on a Saturday night?" I demanded. "Shouldn't you and Brittany be drinking your weight in tequila and making out to Melissa Etheridge?"

"First off Berry, its Britney Spears." Santana corrected. "And everyone needs to come up for air sooner or later."

I snorted.

"Listen," Santana said softly. "Hummel told me that Ava knows about her dad. I was thinking about it all throughout Britt's and I's sweet lady kisses. Are you sure she's ready, Rachel?"

"Ava's very mature for her age." I replied. "And very curious. Sooner or later she was bound to ask about her dad. She is entitled to that, don't you think?"

There was a pause on the other end of the line. "You're right. I was overreacting."

I couldn't help but smirk. "Thought so,"

Santana laughed. "I'm glad we're friends Berry…Rachel."

"Me too," I smiled. "Tell you what, how about you, me, Brittany and Ava go out for lunch tomorrow. I'll buy."

"Sounds great," Santana answered. "Now goodnight Rachel."

"Goodnight Santana,"

* * *

><p>When I woke up the next morning, I groaned to myself. It was already nine o' clock, I was supposed to meet Santana and Brittany in a little over two hours. I rolled out of my bed and took a shower, letting the warm water soothe me.<p>

Ava was already in front of the TV, dressed and watching the Disney channel.

"Morning Ava Bear," I greeted her.

"Morning Mom," Ava said. "Did you sleep well?"

I laughed. "Yes, how about you?"

"Well…not so good." She answered

"Really? Why?" I inquired. Ava turned off the TV and followed me into the kitchen. "Hot chocolate?" She nodded and I tore open a pack of cocoa.

"I had a strange dream last night," confessed Ava. "It wasn't a nightmare, exactly…I had a dream about my dad."

I poured the packets of hot chocolate mix into two mugs of hot water. "Tell me about the dream," I said. "Were you scared?"

Ava shook her head. "No, at least not right away. When the dream started I was talking to a man. There was a shadow over his face, but I didn't care. I felt…happy. Peaceful, almost." Ava's face fell. "Then he leaned forward and I saw his face. He said to me 'Ava, I'm your dad,'. But before I could say anything, his face…changed. A second later he was Sam and then Puck and then Finn. Everyone said the same thing, 'Ava, I'm your dad,'. Then I tried to run. The door was locked." Ava's eyes filled with tears. "They were suddenly behind me, all four of them, each one begging me to believe them. I didn't know which one to look at. All around me, 'Ava, Ava, Ava,'. Then I screamed. 'Stop!' I screamed. 'Stop, stop, stop all of you!'. And then you appeared Mommy."

I sat down with Ava at the table and placed a mug in front of her. She wiped her eye with one finger.

"All of their attention went to you. 'Rachel,' they called. 'Rachel, don't you love me more? Don't you love me best?'. You threw me behind you and they all swarmed around us, Sam and Puck and Finn and the other man. Then you began to cry and that's when I genuinely felt scared."

I traced the ring the hot chocolate left on the table with my finger and swallowed. "Then what happened sweetie?"

"Nothing," Ava said. "That's when I woke up." Ava looked up at me and sipped her drink. "Who was the other man, Mommy?"

I rose from the table and went to the hall closet. I picked up a small, cardboard box. Inside were several photos and mementos. On top was Ava's birth certificate and christening dress as well as a picture of her as a newborn in her father's arms, her hospital bracelet attached. I pushed those aside, below were many other items such as my wedding ring, a yearbook from 2011, a DVD from the glee club performance at Nationals senior year and what I had been looking for, a small scrapbook with a large glitter heart on the front. I took out the first picture I could find with him in it, Jesse St. James.

I took the photo to Ava and pointed at Jesse's face. "Is this the man you didn't recognize?"

Ava nodded. "Yes. Yes that's him."

Then the doorbell rang. I half rose in my chair but Ava stopped me. "I'll get it, Mom." She took the last sip of her hot cocoa before answering the door. "Hi Aunt Brittany! Hi Aunt Santana!"

"Hi Ava," I heard Brittany chirp as I exited the kitchen. Sure enough, the blonde was hugging my daughter and peppering her face with kisses.

"Let the girl breathe, Britts," Santana laughed before turning to me. "Why aren't you dressed yet Berry? We have to be at the restaurant at noon."

I nodded and excused myself to go change. When I returned, Ava, Santana and Brittany were all in the family room talking nicely.

"So Ava," Brittany said. "We heard your mama told you about your dad."

Ava nodded. "Yeah, but-"

"We know it must be hard to hear your father left you." Santana was saying. "But your mother and F-"

"Santana!" I cut her off. All three girls looked at me. "I haven't finished the story yet,"

"It's a mystery story," Ava explained. "I have to guess who my father is." My daughter smiled at me. "But I think I'm narrowing it down."


	6. Want You To Move On

Disclaimer: Do you honestly think I own Glee or Definitely, Maybe?

Author's Note: Sorry for not updating in forever! I apologize! Fanfiction wouldn't let me log in so I had to wait almost five hours to upload this. And, in case you were wondering, the reason Finn is marked as the second character is not because he is Ava's dad (I'm not saying he isn't, I'm saying if he is that is not why he is the second character), it is because the flashbacks and story will mostly be about Rachel and Finn's relationship. Sure it will focus on her and Sam and Puck and Jesse too, but not as much. And the endgame ships are top secret (honestly, I haven't even decided all of them yet). Finally, please review! I'll try to update again after eight. ~Jackie

* * *

><p>We arrived at the small café just past twelve. I was surprised to find Quinn, Kurt and Blaine (baby Autumn too, of course) all waiting for us.<p>

"What are you guys doing here?" I asked as we exchanged greetings. Ava ran over to hug her uncles and "aunt".

"Brittany invited them," Santana said, sitting down in one of the wicker chairs. The rest of us followed her example. "We figured you wouldn't mind,"

"Of course not,"

"I just thought we should tell you all at once," Brittany added, beaming.

"What?" Ava asked excitedly. "Please tell me Aunt Brittany!"

Brittany smiled. "Your Aunt Santana and I are going to have a baby,"

The response was chaos, we were all talking and screaming and freaking out at once. It was impossible to hear anyone clearly.

"Wait, you're pregnant?" I gasped.

"Not yet," Santana replied. "But hopefully soon,"

"Who's going to carry the kid?" Quinn questioned, taking a sip of her iced tea.

"I want San too," said Brittany. "I want the baby to be just like her."

Santana snorted in response. "Just like me, huh?" She rolled her eyes before kissing her wife sweetly on the cheek. "Okay. As long as the donor looks just like you."

Brittany leaned in for another kiss, but Ava spoke before Santana could move. "Aunt Brittany? Aunt Santana?"

"Yes?" They both said at that same time.

"You're going to tell the baby who it's dad is, right?" She asked. "For me? Please?"

Brittany's face fell and she opened her mouth to reply, but Santana gestured as if to say "I got this". She looked at me as she answered Ava's question. "Of course, _chica_. Anything for you,"

* * *

><p>When Ava and I got home, she immediately began begging me to tell some more of the story.<p>

"Please, please, _please_ Mommy?" Her lower lip jutted out, and I caved instantly.

"Fine," I said and Ava smiled. We sat down on the couch. Outside it had just begun to rain and so I found myself staring out through the doors by the terrace, watching the drops form on the glass, people running down the streets to get out of the storm, the taxi cabs lined up on the crowded street, the lights becoming blurred by the water covering the door. "So," I finally said. "Where did I stop?"

_Puck had recommended I sing a song to Finn in glee club. "You can find some song about cheating and hurting and all that crap, right?" He had said. "You're Rachel Berry, you have a song for everything." He was right, I did have a song I wanted to sing to Finn. And so, in glee club the next day, I raised my hand and asked Mr. Schue if I could perform something for the class. _

"_Sure, Rachel," He said. "Show us what you've got." _

_I stood up and walked to the front of the room. I stood center, my hands folded, my eyes meeting everyone's in the room. "This song is dedicated to someone I hurt recently, you know who you are, and I just want to say that I'm sorry, but you have to move on. Forget about me." _

**Remember all the things we wanted**

**Now all our memories they're haunted**

**We were always meant to say goodbye**

**Even with our fists held high**

**It never would've worked out right**

**We were never meant for do or die**

**I didn't want us to burn out**

**I didn't come here to hold you, now I can't stop**

**I want you to know that it doesn't matter**

**Where we take this road someone's gotta go**

**And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better**

**But I want you to move on so I'm already gone**

**Looking at you makes it harder**

**But I know that you'll find another**

**That doesn't always make you want to cry**

**Started with a perfect kiss then we could feel the poison set in**

**Perfect couldn't keep this love alive**

**You know that I love you so, I love you enough to let you go**

**I want you to know that it doesn't matter**

**Where we take this road someone's gotta go**

**And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better**

**But I want you to move on so I'm already gone**

**I'm already gone, already gone**

**You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong**

**I'm already gone, already gone**

**There's no moving on so I'm already gone**

**Already gone, already gone, already gone**

**Already gone, already gone, already gone, yeah**

**Remember all the things we wanted**

**Now all our memories they're haunted**

**We were always meant to say goodbye**

**I want you to know that it doesn't matter**

**Where we take this road someone's gotta go**

**And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better**

**But I want you to move on so I'm already gone**

**I'm already gone, already gone**

**You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong**

**I'm already gone, already gone**

**There's no moving on so I'm already gone**

_When I finished singing, the room was full of applause. My gaze met Finn's, and I could see the behind his clapping façade, he was __**broken**__. His eyes were emotionless, his mouth positioned in a small frown, and it just broke my heart to see him that way. It was then I made a decision. _

_After Glee, I pulled Puck away from the others. _

"_I need you to help me," I explained. _

"_Again?" He sighed. "Now I know why I don't do this 'being nice' thing more often! People begin to expect it from you all the time!" _

"_Look Noah," I said sternly. "I'm not asking for much. And I know what I want from you is definitely in your areas of expertise." I paused. "I want you to be my fake boyfriend." _

"_Wait, what?" Puck asked. "Why me?" _

"_I need Finn to move on," I clarified. "If I find someone else, maybe he'll finally realize we can't be together anymore. And why not you?" I smiled seductively. "You're hot, I'm hot, you're the only guy who can understand my Jewish faith. We're perfect together." _

_Puck thought for a second. "Do I get to make out with you?" _

_I batted my eyelashes and nodded slowly. _

"_Okay," Puck agreed. "So, do we start now?" _

_I nodded again and Puck took my hand as the two of us walked down the hallway together. I laughed at nothing and rested my head on his shoulder. Surprisingly though, as we flirted, Finn wasn't the only one looking on sadly, but Sam as well. _

* * *

><p>Review?<p> 


	7. Real Problem

Disclaimer: Glee is not mine. Definitely, Maybe is not mine.

Author's Note: Awwww, only six? Whatever, I couldn't stay away and I didn't write for awhile, so it makes sense that some people lost interest. I'm sorry, just please review! This time I'll update after only six reviews, but I'd love more! ~Jackie

* * *

><p>"Oh Mom," Ava said. "This can't be good. You're just setting Puck up to get his heartbroken."<p>

I smiled. The words sounded strange coming out of the mouth of an eleven year old. "You're right, sweetie," I replied. "Do you want me to keep going?"

Ava nodded eagerly so I continued the story.

* * *

><p><em>Days later, I decided to announce Puck and I's "relationship" to the glee club. <em>

"_Glee clubbers!" I proclaimed. "May I have your attention please?" Everyone turned to me and I motioned for Puck to stand at my side. I took his hand and I swore I saw Finn and Sam's smiles falter. I pretended not to have noticed and looked away from their faces. "Noah and I are deeply, irrevocably in love!" Then, as if it would prove my point, I kissed him sloppily. _

_The glee club murmured half hearted congratulations and we continued with our meeting. Puck and I sat next to each other and he held my hand the entire time. I could feel my palms sweating and I'd think he did too, but Puck didn't say anything about my nerves. _

* * *

><p>"Finn and Sam must've really been sad," Ava interrupted. "You hurt their feelings, Mom."<p>

"I did," I admitted. "I wanted them to get over me, but I just broke their hearts more than I already did."

"You just said you wanted _them_ to get over you," My daughter pointed out. "Before, you said you just wanted _Finn_ to get over you. Does this mean you cared about Sam too?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Yeah I guess it does."

* * *

><p>"<em>Hey Rach, can I talk to you for a sec?" <em>

_I looked up and saw Finn standing in the choir room doorway. Glee had ended half an hour ago, so I wondered why he was still there. I couldn't help but smiles when I heard him call me 'Rach' again…_

"_Sure Finn," I said as coolly as I could muster. "What's up?" _

"_I need to ask you something," He replied, walking towards me. "And I need you to be entirely honest when you answer me," _

"_Oh my God, you're not going to propose again are you?" _

"_Umm, no." Finn looked me in the eyes, giving me that same innocent but charming look I had always loved when we were together. "What I want to know is…do you really love Puck?" _

"_Of course I love him!" I lied through my teeth. Well, at least it was a lie then. _

"_Then," Finn said as he backed away. "I wish you two nothing but the best." _

"_Finny-" I began, but it was too late. He was already gone. At that moment I thought of the song I had sung, the look on his face, when he had gotten down on one knee, and I just wept. _

* * *

><p>"Finn sounded really nice," Ava said as I paused. "He loved you a lot, didn't he?"<p>

"He did. And I loved him a lot too."

* * *

><p><em>The next morning I went back to the choir room to practice my scales before school started. I was in the middle of an exercise when I heard a knock at the door. I jumped in my seat and turned around. <em>

_Sam was standing there, looking incredibly handsome that day. He flashed me a beautiful smile. "I hope I'm not intruding," _

"_Of course not," I retorted. "Come on in, Sam." _

"_Thanks," Sam replied as he stepped into the choir room. "Look, there's a reason I came here. And it's not because I wanted to practice my singing." _

"_Oh?" I said sweetly, trying to act as if I was perfectly fine, when I was really thinking about what Finn had asked me the afternoon before. "And what is that, Sammy?" _

"_Please, don't call me Sammy. Not now." His voice was hard and cold and I flinched. Sam swallowed hard and I could see his Adam's apple bobbing up and down from halfway across the room. "Rachel, do you love Puck?" _

"_Yes," I lied once more. _

"_Do you love Finn?" _

_I thought for a moment. "Yes." I gushed. "And I always will love him," _

"_Now, do you love me?" _

"…_Yes." I answered truthfully. "I do love you, Sam Evans." _

"_And I love you too, Rachel Berry." Sam said. "But you have to make up your mind." _

"_Excuse me?" _

"_Which one of us do you want? Puck, Finn or me? Or maybe none of us at all?" _

"_I don't know," I told him harshly. "Sam, it's not easy for me to pick! I need more time!"_

"_Time?" Sam snapped back. "Goddamnit Rachel! Make up your damn mind!" _

_I felt tears prick my eyes. "Sam-" I choked on his name and the first tear streamed down my cheek. "Please, don't yell at me." _

_Sam shook his head. "Sorry," he mumbled, and then he fled the room. _

_I wiped my eyes and pulled my knees to my chest. I thought of Sam, who I thought I loved, yet I wasn't sure. I thought of Finn, loveable Finn who I had cared deeply about since day one. I thought of Puck, my Noah, who had done a complete three-sixty and was now the supportive friend slash fake boyfriend. But I lingered on Finn. I knew if I had to pick which one of them I loved the most, it would be Finn. It always would be Finn. I had been doodling "Mrs. Finn Hudson" in my notebooks since the day we first met. But I knew, if I really loved Finn, we couldn't be together. Because he was too good for a conflicted girl like me. _

* * *

><p>"That sounds awful," Ava said. "Why was Sam so mad at you?"<p>

I shrugged. "It was stupid of me to love three boys at the same time,"

"You're not stupid, Mom."

"Thanks." I replied. "I was just so confused. There was Puck, who was sweet but not my love. There was Sam, who was stunning yet kind. And then Finn, innocent yet charming. And I loved them all in different ways. Does that make any sense?"

Ava shook her head. "No," She confessed.

I opened my mouth to explain it to her when I heard the phone ring. I ran to answer it. "Hello?"

"Hi Rachel. It's me, Brittany."

"Oh, hi Brittany. What is it?"

"Well, you know how San and I had the appointment to go meet our sperm donor after lunch?" Brittany began.

"Yes, I'm aware,"

"Well, there's a…problem."

I sighed. "A real problem or a "Rachie I slept in my bra and now my nipples really hurt" problem?"

There was a pause, a muffled, male voice from afar, Brittany saying something to someone on her end of the conversation. Then she came back on the phone. "A _real_ problem, Rachel."

* * *

><p>What do you think is gonna happen? I'd love to hear your thoughts! Please review!<p> 


	8. Donor

Disclaimer: I don't not own Glee or Definitely, Maybe. Why would I be on Fanfiction if I did?

Author's Note: Review, pretty please? I'll update after five reviews. ~Jackie

* * *

><p>Brittany told me to get down to the clinic right away and so I did. I had to be there for my friends. In my mind as Ava and I stood on the subway I thought of all the things that could've gone wrong. Were they infertile? Were there no sperm donors willing to donate to a lesbian couple? I didn't know and I was freaking out.<p>

I practically ran into the clinic, Ava close behind me.

"Wait for me!" She called out, racing to my side. I took her hand and we approached the front desk together.

"I'm looking for Santana Lopez," I said to the receptionist.

"Are you Miss Rachel Berry?" She asked. I nodded. "Alright, then you may go in. Room 513."

I thanked her and Ava and I sped off to find the room. It wasn't too far down the corridor, the first room on the left, and I immediately flung open the door and entered in my usual dramatic fashion.

Santana sat on an examining table, a doctor on her one side, Brittany on the other. "Glad you could make it, Rachel, Ava." Brittany said with a smile.

I opened my mouth to reply, when suddenly Ava dropped my hand and walked over to a row of chairs. "Ava, sweetie, what are you-" I stopped when I saw the man sitting in one of the chairs, his eyes transfixed on my confused daughter. I stifled a gasp. "Sam," I said.

* * *

><p>Brittany plopped down next to where Sam and I sat in the waiting room, placing two cups of hot coffee in front of us. "You both look so tired," She explained sweetly, before rising and going back into the room. Sam and I picked up the Styrofoam cups awkwardly and we both took a sip, his a large gulp and mine a dainty swallow. When Sam looked back up at me I did realize he looked…worn out. Tired. Distressed, even.<p>

"So," I began. "How did you get selected to donate sperm to Santana and Brittany? Your hair isn't even naturally blonde,"

Sam choked on his coffee. I patted his back. "Y-yes it is." He stuttered.

"Don't you remember that time I walked in on your dye treatment?" I teased.

He chuckled in response. "Okay, so maybe I said it was natural."

I rolled my eyes. "Trust me Sam, no one thinks _that's_ natural,"

"Well, to answer your question, I became a donor to sort of, make myself feel better." Sam began, taking another sip of his coffee before placing it down on the table. I did the same.

"A little strong for me," I explained.

"I could go get you some creamer,"

"No thank you,"

Sam shrugged and continued. "I hurt you so bad, Rachel. I hurt my family so fricking bad. It made me feel like crap,"

"And you think this is going to make up for it?" I questioned harshly.

"I hope so,"

"Trust me, it won't." I hissed. "I don't want you around Ava,"

"Why not?" Sam asked, his voice rising slightly. "You think you can just tell me to stay away and I will?"

"You should, she's my daughter! You lost any chance to be in my life or hers!" I got up and began to walk back to Santana's room.

Sam shook his head. "That's too bad, because I have a little information you might like to know." I turned around quickly, stopping in my tracks, and he smiled. "The whereabouts of one of your old loves."

"Who?" I asked curiously. "And how did you find out?"

Sam pulled something from his coat pocket. A newspaper. He stood up and placed it in my hands. "Guess who's playing the male lead in the next production of _Phantom_."

I opened the paper slowly and hesitantly, drawing in a sharp breath when I saw the picture on the front page. "Jesse St. James. I should've known."

"According to the article he's going to 'make his dramatic Broadway return in one of the most iconic musicals of all time'." Sam said and we both laughed uneasily.

"That man disgusts me even more than you," I added, handing the paper back.

"Ummm…thank you?"

"Mom," We both looked up, Ava stood a few feet away. "Aunt Brittany and Aunt Santana want to see you,"

* * *

><p>"I am so sorry, Rachel," Santana said as soon as I walked into the room. "We didn't know it would be…<em>him<em>."

"It's not your fault," I soothed, hugging her briefly before doing the same with Brittany. "God, I can't believe out of all the available donors you got Sam Evans!"

"Weird, huh?" Brittany remarked, pushing her hair behind her ears. "Maybe it's Fate, trying to say that you two should be together-"

"No," I cut her off. "Been there, done that. It wasn't a pretty ending for us,"

"Brittany didn't mean it that way, Rachel." Santana stated defensively. "She's just trying to be optimistic,"

"Well, then call me a pessimist," I snorted.

"So," Brittany tried to change the subject. "Should we still go through with it?"

"Are there any other donors?" I asked.

"No," replied Santana. "No one else who has all the qualities we want is willing to give sperm to two lesbians."

"I think so," I answered honestly. "I don't want you guys to not have a kid because of me. You'll be great mothers."

* * *

><p>When I exited the room, I was a little taken aback to see Sam and Ava sitting down next to each other, talking as Ava stared down at the newspaper I had been shown earlier.<p>

"What are you doing?" I demanded.

"I'm talking to Sam," explained Ava. "And guess what Mom? Jesse's in town! That guy from my dream, remember? Can I go meet him too?"

"No," I said harshly. "Ava, let's go."

"Please Mommy-"

"Rachel-" began Sam.

"Ava Barbra Berry, now."

Sam and Ava looked at each other and Ava took my hand loyally, waving goodbye to Sam as we walked away. They both knew I was dead serious.

* * *

><p>When we got home, I was surprised that Ava wasn't in one of her moods.<p>

"How does Jesse come into the story?" She asked.

"He shows up real soon, actually," I said. "In fact, his part is next. Want me to tell it?"

Of course, Ava said yes.

* * *

><p>Review! I can't stress than enough! Review, review, review!<p> 


	9. What's The Definition of Real?

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or Definitely, Maybe.

Author's Note: Please review! And no, Sam has not been eliminated from the list of contenders. I went back and changed what Rachel said from "She's my daughter! Not yours!" to "She's my daughter! You lost any chance to be in my life or hers!" because her saying "she's not your daughter" could be perceived in a different way than I meant it. So, don't ever eliminate anyone until the end. Now, Jesse comes into the story in this chapter! And I'd love to hear who you think Ava's dad is in the form of a review (hint, hint). ~Jackie

* * *

><p><em>I was cleaning up after Glee practice in the auditorium. Everyone had left behind a mess of glitter and costume scraps and I swept the stage, humming "My Man" to myself. Soon I was fully fledged singing. <em>

**Oh my man I love him so **

**He'll never know **

**All my life is just despair **

**But I don't care **

**When he takes me in his arms **

**The world is bright all right **

**What's the difference if I say **

**I'll go away **

**When I know I'll come back on my knees someday **

**For whatever my man is **

**I am his forever more**

_Suddenly, I heard clapping echo throughout the auditorium, someone walking towards me. "Brava, brava. How I love it when you sing that song, Rachel," _

_I squinted and his face appeared in the spotlight, smiling devilishly. "Jesse," I remarked. "What are you doing here?" _

"_Aren't you happy to see me?" He teased, coming to join me on stage. "And what is a beautiful leading lady like you doing cleaning up?" _

"_I volunteered," I said. "Now, answer my question, please." _

"_I've come to make you a once in a lifetime offer that could make you a big, big star." Jesse replied. "I've been offered the role of Radames in the musical, Aida. We are still looking for the right young starlet to play the title character, and I have decided to ask you if you were interested." _

"_Me?" I gasped. "Why me?" _

"_You're a very talented girl, Rachel." Jesse said. "The musical doesn't open until June, so you only have to miss a few weeks of school at the end of the year. I know you're sad you didn't get into NYADA, but this will help your career so much." _

* * *

><p>"What's NYADA?" Ava asked.<p>

"It's a university here," I explained. "NYADA stands for 'New York Academy of the Dramatic Arts.' Senior year your Uncle Kurt and I both applied for it. He got in, but I didn't."

"Really?" Ava gasped. "But you're so good Mom! Don't tell Uncle Kurt I said this, but I think you're better than him."

I laughed. "Your uncle's pretty amazing too."

* * *

><p>"<em>I don't know," I responded. "I'm basically putting everything on the line for me to do this. And what if I don't get the part?" <em>

"_I have connections, Rachel. I can almost guarantee this part is yours. We haven't seen a single good audition yet! And I'm sure Finn won't mind. That guy follows you like a lost puppy." _

_I looked at the floor. "Finn isn't my boyfriend, anymore. I'm with Noah." _

"_That's a shame," Jesse spoke without sympathy. Then he grinned. "Hey! I know what'll make you feel better! Auditioning for this part!"_

_I shrugged. "I'll have to think about it," _

* * *

><p>"You go."<p>

"Excuse me?" I said, I hadn't been paying attention. I had been getting lost in my thoughts.

"You go with Jesse," Ava stated. "I could tell me asking to go see him made you upset, so he must've done something to you, am I right?"

"Well, how about I continue? This is a really emotional part."

* * *

><p><em>I met Puck at his locker the next day. <em>

"_Hey Hot Jewish American Princess," He said when he saw me, leaning forward to give me a kiss. I deepened it, hoping to make him happy before I told him of my plans. "So, what's up?" _

"_Guess who I saw yesterday?" I asked him. _

_Puck thought for a moment. "Dunno," He caved. "Who?" _

"_Jesse St. James," I mumbled. _

"_Who? Can you speak up, Rachel?"_

_I cleared my throat. "Jesse St. James," I answered a little louder._

"_That asshole?" Puck demanded. "What, do you want me to kick the crap out of him for you? I'm sure I could get Sam and Finn onboard too-"_

"_Noah, baby," I said softly, placing a hand gently on his shoulder. "Jesse asked me to be on Broadway with him. And I think I'm going to say yes." _

_He frowned in reply. "The Hell? So you're going to leave me here? You're going to leave us all here?" _

"_Noah, it's not like that-"_

"_Yes! It kind of is! Look, Rachel, I know I'm not the smartest guy with the brightest future, I can't get you an easy ticket out of Lima like St. Jackass can, but I care about you. Lima Loser or not, I care about you." _

"_Why are you acting like this whole relationship is real?" I questioned boldly. "Noah, __**Puck**__, it's not real!" _

"_It's real to me!" He said, his volume rising. I admit here I got a little wide eyed and I jumped as Puck slammed his locker door and turned to face me. "Rachel, I've fallen in love with you! Don't you see?" _

"_No," I cried, my voice thick. "This wasn't supposed to happen!" _

_And then, he kissed me again. Harder. Much harder. "Well, it did." _


	10. Rebecca

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or the movie Definitely, Maybe. So do not sue me, please!

Author's Note: Review, review, review! And I'm so sorry for not updating in a little while, I've just been crazy busy and stuff. But, yeah. Worry no more, cause here I am with an update! Yay! ~Jackie

* * *

><p>"Who did you chose?" Ava asked. "Puck or Jesse?"<p>

I closed my eyes and thought back, thinking of the look on Puck's face when he told me he loved me. "You'll find out soon enough, Ava Bear."

"Promise?"

I swallowed, my eyes fluttering open. "I promise."

* * *

><p>Ava and I spent the rest of our Sunday as we normally would. It was a beautiful day outside, so I decided a walk in Central Park would be nice. After a long, peaceful walk we'd stopped at a Starbucks, a skinny latte for me, a hot chocolate for Ava.<p>

"Can you tell some more now?"

I looked up from the magazine I had been skimming, looking on in disgust at an article about Jesse's production of _Phantom of the Opera, _and met Ava's pleading gaze. I closed my magazine and nodded. "Okay. Now let me think, what happened next…"

* * *

><p><em>The next day, Puck and I walked into Glee rehearsal separately and sat as far away from each other as possible. No one mentioned anything, but I caught a few worried looks from Quinn, Kurt and Blaine as time passed. Puck and I's gazes met once, but we both looked away before we could make eye contact for once. Finn mouthed "Are you okay?" to me from his spot down the row and I mouthed an insincere "Peachy" in reply. Finally, when Mr. Schue asked me if I'd like to sing the female solo on a number we were going to perform at an assembly and I turned it down, everyone knew I was definitely not okay. <em>

"_Go home," Mr. Schue said. _

"_Excuse me?" I asked, perplexed. _

"_Go home," the teacher repeated. "You don't seem like yourself, Rachel. You should go home and rest."_

_Normally I would've blatantly refused to leave practice early, but since I felt like total crap, I grabbed my things and obliged. As I walked down the hallway, I pulled my cell phone from my bag and selected the correct number from my contact list. I lifted the phone to my ear as it rung and I stepped into the McKinley High parking lot. _

_Jesse's forever annoying voice appeared on the other end by the second ring. "Hello?" _

"_Hey Jesse, it's Rachel. I've called to tell you I'm in,"_

* * *

><p>"Jesse is so my dad," Ava remarked, dragging 'so' out long enough to make it sound like it had fifteen syllables.<p>

I smirked. "Final answer?"

Ava groaned as she took a sip of her hot chocolate. "No,"

"Good, cause the story is far from over."

* * *

><p><em>I arranged to meet Jesse for dinner at Breadstix the next night to discuss when I'd be able to make it to New York. I'd worn one of my cutest skirt and blouse combos and a pair of heels (which I was not good at walking in, at all) and entered the restaurant with a forced air of confidence. However, it broke after five seconds in the place when I saw Finn having dinner with another girl. <em>

_God, she was so damn pretty! Her auburn hair was done up in a bun and had big, brown doe eyes that just made her look so innocent. She had on this super cute wrap dress that made her look fashionable and sexy, yet not slutty. And that laugh, I could tell from the first time I heard it she was a soprano._

_It felt like I was standing there for ages when Finn finally saw me. "Rachel?" He breathed. "Rachel, hi. This is umm…" He looked very surprised to see me and was speaking anymore._

_The pretty brunette sprang up and walked over to me (_she_ could walk in heels). "Hi! So you're the famous Rachel! Finn just raves about you! I'm Rebecca!" _

_I shook her outstretched hand. "Yes, nice to meet you, Rebecca." I glanced over at the boy still sitting at the table. "Mind if I talk to Finn for a second?" I asked. _

_Rebecca smiled brightly. "Not at all!" She turned back to Finn. "I'll be in the little girls' room if you need me, Finny." _

_I frowned. I had always been the one to call him Finny! I was ready to break Fricking-Perfect-Rebecca's perfect neck by the time she skipped off to the restroom. _

_I sat down across from Finn at the table, pushing Rebecca's plate of spaghetti and meatballs away from me (at least the girl wasn't too perfect to eat meat). "She seems nice," I said coldly. _

_Finn nodded. "She sure is. But I don't think I want to see her again." _

_I raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Really?" _

"_She's just…she's not you." Finn confessed quickly. I swore I saw him blush. _

"_Oh. Really." I repeated, pleased at his answer. _

"_What are you doing here?" Finn asked, a hint of embarrassment still in his voice. "Do you have a date?" _

"_I'm meeting Jesse," I admitted reluctantly. I knew lying would do me no good. It never did. And I just couldn't lie to Finn. _

_His hands clenched into fists, but other than that he kept his composure. "Are you guys back together?" _

"_No," I insisted. "He just got me a Broadway audition," _

_Finn's face lit up. "Oh my God! That's awesome!" Before I knew it, we were hugging warmly. "Rachel, I'm so proud of you! I know you'll get it!" _

_Now it was my turn to blush. "I don't know about that," I tried to say as modestly as I could. "So, what's up with you?" _

"_I've decided that I want to enlist." Finn said after a moment. "Staying here's just…too painful." _

_I nodded, trying to be understanding. "Are you happy?" I dared to question. _

_Finn shrugged. "I don't know. I guess I could be. What about you?" _

"_I'm not sure either," I mumbled and Finn rubbed my hand affectionately. _

"_Excuse me," We both looked up to see Rebecca standing there. "May I have my seat back, please?" I sensed a bit of jealousy in her voice and simpered as I stood up. _

"_Of course," I said coyly as Rebecca took her seat back. I flashed Finn a warm grin. "Bye Finn. I'll see you around." _

"_See you, Rachel," He replied as I walked away evenly, secretly trying to keep the tears pricking my eyes away._

* * *

><p>"You can stop now, if you want." Ava interrupted. "We should probably be getting home anyway. See, the sun's going down."<p>

I looked outside, realizing Ava was right. The Starbucks was not nearly as full as it had been when we'd first arrived either, only two other groups still remained. "Alright baby," I answered. "How bout I tell some more when I pick you up from school tomorrow?"

Ava smiled. "You're the best mommy ever!"

I felt extremely happy to hear Ava say that. "Thanks, Ava Bear. You're the best daughter ever." Now, if only Ava could have the best daddy ever.


	11. Scenes From An Airport

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee. I don't own Definitely, Maybe.

Author's Note: Review? Who do you think Ava's dad is? I'd like to know! ~Jackie

* * *

><p>"I don't like Rebecca," Ava stated. "She sounds like a goody two shoes, just like Kathy Reynolds from my math class. She always raises her hand for every question and gives our teachers lots of compliments and corrects everyone else whenever they do something wrong."<p>

I cracked a smile. "Don't worry baby, I didn't like her either."

The rest of the night flew by. Ava and I went home and had a small dinner, neither one of us were terribly hungry, and then we watched a few Disney reruns before it was time for Ava to go to bed. I tucked her in and she was asleep before I could even turn off the light. I returned to the family room, plopping down on the couch and channel surfing. I stopped at a local news station, disgusted to find they were doing a piece on _Phantom_.

"And now, here he is, the star of the Broadway revival of _Phantom of the Opera_, Mr. Jesse St. James!" chorused the reporter, and I turned the TV off quickly.

"I wish I didn't ever have to see that ass's face again," I said to myself, deciding to go to bed too. I figured I wouldn't be getting much sleep anyway, I'd been thinking of my four past flames every night since I'd begun telling the story.

* * *

><p>I honked the car horn and Ava came running from her school, waving happily as she climbed in. "Tell me more!" She chorused immediately from shotgun as she buckled her seatbelt. I laughed.<p>

"Can't you tell me about your day first?"

Ava sighed, but obliged. She did like to talk, after all. "Well, Kathy Reynolds, the annoying girl from my math class, was being a braggart like she always is because she got a one hundred on our pop quiz, but I got a one hundred too and I didn't brag!"

"Well that's good, anything else?"

"I couldn't focus in social studies because I was thinking about the story, and when my teacher called on me I didn't know the answer, so she made me stay after class. And the lunch today was disgusting, I had to share half a PB&J with my friends,"

"Well," I said, "It seems like you need some story to cheer you up!"

Ava clapped her hands in excitement.

* * *

><p><em>I spotted Jesse and made my way over to him. He'd already ordered me something from the vegan menu, I was surprised by his courtesy, and I sat down. <em>

"_Hello," I said professionally. _

"_Hey," He replied. "I'm glad you could make it," _

"_You're just hoping to get laid after," I interjected bluntly. _

_Jesse laughed loudly, playing with the food on his plate. "I'm not going to lie Rachel, I'm still insanely attracted to you," _

"_I suppose I would be lying if I said I was totally over you, either," I confessed, making Jesse grin. "But I just got out of two relationships right after each other, I'm not ready to enter another one so soon," _

_He nodded, frowning. "I get it," He muttered. "It's okay," _

_I was only partially listening though, because I was amazed at the words that came out of my mouth. Was I actually referring to my fling with Puck as a real relationship now? _

"_Uh, Rachel?" _

"_Hmm?" _

_Apparently I'd spaced out longer than I'd thought. _

"_I was asking you about when you could leave for New York," _

_The next words came out of my mouth before I could think. "How about next week?" _

_Across from me, Jesse smiled. _

* * *

><p>"Next week?" Ava gasped as we pulled into the parking lot outside the apartment complex. I opened her door for her and she bounded out eagerly. "Mom, how could you say that?"<p>

I shrugged. "I just wanted to get out of there,"

"Can you keep going, please?" Ava asked. "This story is really good,"

"I'm glad you like it, and of course. Just promise to start on your homework as soon as we're done."

"I can multi-task!" I laughed and Ava's eyebrows knitted together. "That wasn't supposed to be funny!"

* * *

><p><em>The next Glee meeting, I ask Mr. Schue if I can make an announcement and tell everyone that I'm leaving. <em>

"_What?" Finn, Puck and Sam all say at the same time, making them scowl at each other before turning back to me. _

"_I'm sorry," I said. "But this is a once in the lifetime opportunity for me, I can't turn it down,"_

"_That's a bunch of bull-" Puck began, but Mr. Schue cleared his throat, signaling him to stop. He sat back, his arms crossed across his chest and gave our teacher a small huff. His hand shook, like he was tempted to give him the finger but I shook my head. _

"_We're happy for you Rachel," Finn interjected and I turned my attention from a pissed off Puck to the other boy. "Broadway's always been your dream and we all think you'll do awesome, right guys?" The rest of the glee club nodded and mumbled words of encouragement. _

"_Just don't forget all of us back home in Lima, Ohio, okay?" Quinn teased and I nodded. _

_Then Mr. Schue starts a group hug and we all crowd together, the warmth from everyone else's bodies surrounded me and I suddenly felt like such an awful person for leaving them all behind. I looked up to Finn's smiling face, that dopey grin made my heart sink, and then to Puck's fading glare, he was still in love with me, I knew it, and then I turned to glance at Sam. His face was stone cold and I couldn't read it, but I could tell he was sorry to see me go too. And at that moment, I knew I'd miss these three most of all._

* * *

><p>"<em>Oh my God! How pretty!" I gasped, looking at the bouquet of red roses the glee club had brought me. It was Saturday, the day of my flight to New York, and they'd come to say goodbye to me in the parking lot, Jesse standing moodily nearby and saying how we needed to get moving before security got too crowded. <em>

"_We figured since we couldn't be there for your opening night, we should give you the flowers now," Kurt explained as he placed them in my arms, winking. Both of us were trying not to cry. "I'll see you soon, right?" _

"_Right," I confirmed and we did the gay high five for old time's sake. _

"_We should go," Jesse interrupted and Kurt gave him the 'bitch face'. I laughed before moving to hug every single one of my teammates. I heard Jesse's annoyed sighs when I was at Finn, Puck and Sam, whose hugs were a little longer than the others. It was just so hard for me to let go of them, when I had spent so many times in those arms, when I had felt that embrace before and known their scents like the back of my hand. It seemed so long ago. _

"_Goodbye guys," I said finally as I walked away, the first tear falling down my face. "I'll never forget any of you," _

_Jesse put an arm around my shoulder as we entered the airport, and I didn't reject. I needed some comfort, and he was the only one there to offer any. Right now, he was all I had. _

* * *

><p>Ava was blinking rapidly, as if she herself felt like she might cry. "I could never do that, leaving all my friends behind. Especially if all I had was someone like Jesse,"<p>

"Yeah," I laughed. "That wasn't the smartest thing I ever did,"

"What was?" She asked.

I smiled and kissed her temple. "Having you,"

* * *

><p><em>Jesse and I sat awkwardly at the gate as we waited for our flight to start boarding. Neither one of us spoke or broke the tension, we didn't even look at each other as I skimmed a copy of <em>Vogue, _a gift from Kurt since he wouldn't be around to help with my clothes, and he texted on his phone. _

"_Flight 214 to New York City, New York is now boarding," said the voice on the intercom. _

"_Come on," Jesse said, standing up and taking both of our carry-on's. "Let's go. New York City waits," _

_I smiled, this was what I always wanted after all, and followed Jesse towards the entrance. The flight attendant scanned our boarding passes and beamed. "Have a wonderful trip!" She chirped and Jesse took my hand. _

_As we walked into the aircraft, I swore I heard my name. "Rachel, Rachel, Rachel," At first I thought I was imagining things, but it just got louder and more persistent. Pulling from Jesse's grasp as he went down the aisle, I spun around and saw _him_ running towards the terminal. "Rachel!" He called, his voice just able to make out in the chaos. _

"_Finn?" I screamed back. "Finn?" _

_He stopped and smiled, taking a step forward before the attendant who had been nice to me five seconds earlier pushed him back. _

"_No, I have to get on that plane! You don't understand-" I heard him attempt to explain. Sadly, Finn was right, she didn't understand. _

_I started to run back, but I felt Jesse's hand grab my arm, his nails slowly digging into my flesh. I cringed._

"_Rachel, come on," He said. "I found our seats," _

_I started to pull away, but when I looked back at the door it was closing. The plane began to shake as it started up. I sprung forward, but it was too late. The door was shut and Jesse was pulling me towards our spots as the plane went down the runway. Finn was gone. _

* * *

><p>Hope that wasn't too much of a downer for you. I couldn't resist the old 'run after the girl of your dreams who is about to take a flight far, far away' concept. Please review! I'd love to make it to 100 soon! Thanks for reading guys!<p> 


	12. Excuses, Excuses

Disclaimer: I do not own, I do not own, yadda, yadda, yadda.

Author's Note: I just want to say that you guys are THE BEST! We have passed 100 reviews, which makes me unbelievably excited, and that last chapter had 16 reviews alone, more than any other chapter so far. I love writing this story and I'm glad you guys like it! Please keep reviewing! ~Jackie

* * *

><p>"That's so romantic," Ava sighed. "I can't believe that Finn ran after you, if only you had been able to make it to him in time…"<p>

"I know baby," I said, replaying that heart sinking moment over in my head another time. When I had gotten the chance to get Finn back, and let it slip through my fingers. "But, things would be much different if I had,"

"Do you ever wish you'd gotten back with Finn? That you two were still together?" Ava asked inquisitively. "I don't mean to pry," She added. "I'm just curious."

"I'm perfectly content with my life right now, Ava Bear. Don't worry," I answered, saying nothing more as I walked towards my room. But I knew, that deep down I would always wonder about what it would be like to have a life with Finn, instead of one alone with just me and Ava.

* * *

><p>That night, I got a call from Santana. Normally, I never answered personal calls during dinner, but I had a feeling this one was important, so I did.<p>

"What is it? Are you pregnant?" I gasped into the receiver.

On the other end of the line, Santana huffed. "Hello to you too, Rachel. And for your information Trouty Mouth's sperm was just given to me yesterday, so I can't take a pregnancy test for another two weeks."

"Oh," I mumbled, feeling embarrassed.

"It's about Quinn," Santana stated.

"Quinn? What happened to Quinn?" My mind was reeling. "Oh my God, is _Quinn _pregnant?"

"No!"

"Oh," I repeated, feeling even more embarrassed. "Sorry, I'll just shut up and let you talk."

"Good," Santana chuckled. "Well, you know how Quinn has been dating that dude who's name I don't know for over a year now even though he lives all the way across the country?"

I nodded at first, but then remembered that Santana couldn't see me. "Oh, umm, yeah."

"Well, apparently lover boy is flying out from LA this weekend for a little visit, and Quinn wants us to meet him. She thinks one of us should cook dinner. I've been using the 'I'm probably going to be pregnant by that day so I can't cook anything without crying or throwing up' excuse to get out of it and Kurt and Blaine are using the 'We're the parents of a three month old so shut up Santana and leave us alone before she starts screaming her head off again' excuse. So, congratulations! You're going to be making dinner this week for your best friend's boyfriend and if you screw this up, they'll probably break up and it will be on your conscience forever and ever and ever!" She spewed it all out in one breath. "Have fun!" And then Santana hung up, laughing maniacally.

I let out an exasperated sigh. "That's the Santana I know and am sometimes really annoyed at. Like right now." I could just feel a headache coming on, when did this become my problem? I rubbed my temples, frustrated with my mess of a life that was just becoming more and more complicated by the second. First, I had my ex-boyfriend donating sperm to two of my best friends. Then there was my other ex-boyfriend whose face everywhere due to his new Broadway production. And now, I had to prepare a dinner for my other best friend's boyfriend, who I'd never even met?

"Are you okay?" Ava asked and I nodded feebly. But she didn't buy that. "You're lying. Come on Mom, why don't you lie down, I'll get you some ice." Ava jumped up and opened the freezer, reaching into the ice tray and I crawled onto the couch. So I was taking orders from an eleven year old now, an eleven year old who just happened to be my daughter? Yeah, my life was totally sane (note: that's what I call sarcasm, dear readers).

Ava returned and placed the freezing cold ice pack onto my head, I groaned at the touch. "What did Aunt Santana say?" She asked. "You can tell me."

"Aunt Quinn's boyfriend is coming to visit this weekend, so we're all going to be having dinner. I have to cook," I confessed. "Plus with Sam around and seeing Jesse's egotistical self everywhere I turn, I'm just so stressed out,"

"Well, that won't be so bad," Ava said. "I can't wait to meet Aunt Quinn's boyfriend, she raves about him. Do you think they'll get married? Maybe you'll be the maid of honor! Wouldn't that be awesome?"

"Slow down, Ava Bear," I interjected, pulling her to my side and turning on the TV. "How about we discuss all the details of Aunt Quinn and your future uncle's wedding while we watch the movie adaptation of _The Sound of Music_?" I picked the DVD up off the coffee table. Ava nodded eagerly, springing up off the couch to put it in the player before lying back down next to me.

"I bet whatever you make for dinner will be served at their wedding," She noted and I laughed.

"That wouldn't be a good idea, since I'm pretty sure Quinn doesn't want some of my vegan cooking for her special day,"

"What was your and dad's wedding like?" Ava asked.

I frowned, thinking back to that day. "It was absolutely magical," I began. "I wore the most beautiful dress, with a big full skirt full of tool and a veil that trailed behind me. Your Aunt Quinn was the maid of honor, and she as well as Aunt Santana, Aunt Brittany and all the other bridesmaids wore lavender dresses. Uncle Kurt was best man. Your dad looked so handsome, he wore a white tuxedo with a pin of purple flowers to match the bridesmaid dresses and my bouquet. It was in the suburbs, in a beautiful church, and everyone we loved was there…"

"Were the other three there too? Were Finn, Puck, Sam and Jesse all there on your wedding day?" Ava interrupted.

I paused. "Well, no."

Ava shook her head. "Then not everyone you loved was there,"

* * *

><p>You like? Then review!<p> 


	13. Written In The Stars

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or Definitely, Maybe. Blah, blah, blah, blah!

Author's Note: Review! Review! Review! Review! ~Jackie

* * *

><p>On Tuesday morning, I was so tired. I pressed snooze on my alarm at least five times, so when I finally got out of bed and entered the kitchen, Ava was already dressed and at the table, eating a bowl of cereal.<p>

"Good morning," I said with a yawn.

"Morning Mom," Ava greeted. "You better hurry up and eat some breakfast or we'll both be late. And you might want to fix your hair. And put on some shoes."

I looked down at myself, realizing that my clothes were winkled and I had forgotten to put on some footwear. "Right," I groaned.

* * *

><p>My morning didn't get any better when Ava and I got stuck in a traffic jam.<p>

"Wonderful," I murmured under my breath sarcastically.

"Why don't you tell me some more of the story?" Ava asked. "That will get your mind off this,"

"Sure," I replied. "So, I went to New York City with Jesse…"

* * *

><p>"<em>Jesse, let me go!" I screamed, trying to pull away from him and head towards the ticket counter, but he had a hand on my arm. "Jesse, I want to go home!" <em>

"_Why?" He asked. "You have nothing to go back to there! You gave up everything to come and be with me! If you go back to Lima you won't have anything! You said goodbye to your friends, your schooling is now exclusively online, so why do you need to go back?" _

"_But…Finn," I found myself saying. _

"_What happened to him not deserving you?" Jesse questioned. "You said you wouldn't go back to him. I think this time you need to find someone just as theatrical and overbearing as you," _

"_Like you?" I retorted, not angrily like I meant it though. My voice was small, weak like a little child's. _

"_Yes," He confessed. "I told you Rachel, I still love-"_

_I cut him off with a kiss. "Me too," I admitted, feeling the warm sensation of Jesse St. James's lips still lingering on my own. _

"_You're too good for me," Jesse said. "We're not…we're not…"_

_But when I kissed him again, he didn't object._

* * *

><p>"You and Jesse got back together?" Ava asked me.<p>

"Kind of," I answered. "We were sort of…friends who sometimes made out."

"Like friends with benefits?"

"Ava!" I gasped. How did my eleven year old know what that meant? But, I decided to just answer the question, lest she get suspicious. "We were…friends with minimal benefits."

* * *

><p>"<em>Are you nervous?" Jesse asked me as I waited for my audition. <em>

"_Not at all," I assured him, when I really was quite nervous and I had butterflies in my stomach like never before. "I'll be fine." _

_Jesse gave my shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "You'll be better than fine," He said. "You're the best one here and you'll do great. The part is practically yours." Then, he whispered in my ear: "I'm rooting for you." Before I could say anything, he was gone. _

_Now those four words affected me, because I could remember when Finn said those exact words to me years ago, before I sang "Defying Gravity" with Kurt at my very first diva-off. _

"_Rachel Berry," I heard my name being called, but I couldn't move. "Miss Berry?" I took a slow, steady step forward and kept going until I reached the stage entrance. _

"_I can do this," I thought to myself before walking to center stage and letting the spotlight drench me. It was at that moment, I made a slight change. _

"_Hello my name is Rachel Berry and for my audition I will be singing 'Written In The Stars'." I proclaimed, my voice as cool and confident as I could muster. _

_I saw Jesse frown. "That's not what we agreed on!" He mouthed, but I pretended not to see him as the music began to play. _

**I am here to tell you we can never meet again**

**Simple really, isn't it, a word or two and then**

**A lifetime of not knowing where or how or why or when**

**You think of me or speak of me or wonder what befell**

**The someone you once loved so long ago so well**

**Never wonder what I'll feel as living shuffles by**

**You don't have to ask me and I need not reply**

**Every moment of my life from now until I die**

**I will think or dream of you and fail to understand**

**How a perfect love can be confounded out of hand**

**Is it written in the stars**

**Are we paying for some crime**

**Is that all that we are good for**

**Just a stretch of mortal time**

**Is this God's experiment**

**In which we have no say**

**In which we're given paradise**

**But only for a day**

**Nothing can be altered, oh, there is nothing to decide**

**No escape, no change of heart, no any place to hide**

**You are all I'll ever want but this I am denied**

**Sometimes in my darkest thoughts, I wish I'd never learned**

**What it is to be in love and have that love returned**

**Is it written in the stars**

**Are we paying for some crime**

**Is that all that we are good for**

**Just a stretch of mortal time**

**Is this God's experiment**

**In which we have no say**

**In which we're given paradise**

**But only for a day**

**Is it written in the stars**

**Are we paying for some crime**

**Is that all that we are good for**

**Just a stretch of mortal time**

**Is this God's experiment**

**In which we have no say**

**In which we have no say**

**In which we're given paradise**

**But only for a day**

_By the time I finished, I was out of breath and crying. The director, producer and Jesse alike all began to applaud me and my performance. I smiled, scanning the room. Suddenly, I looked towards the back of the theatre._

_"I just saw…" I said to myself._

_I had just seen someone watching me from the back. But as I studied it closer, nothing. No one was there._

_Perhaps it was only my imagination._


	14. Quinn's Boyfriend

Disclaimer: I only own Ava! Don't sue me, I have no money!

Author's Note: Review! My goal is 130 reviews after this chapter. ~Jackie

* * *

><p>"Did Finn follow you?"<p>

"Hmm?" I asked, looking up at Ava who was watching me do my makeup intently. It was the night of the dinner and I wanted to look good for Quinn's boyfriend. I puckered my lips and applied some clear gloss, smacking the top and bottom together so it would be even.

"You said when you were telling the story on Tuesday that you felt like you were being watched. So, did Finn follow you?" Ava gave me puppy dog eyes. "Please Mom! You haven't told me any for days!"

"Okay," I said, checking the clock. It was quarter to six, we had fifteen minutes. "Well, no, Finn didn't follow me. It was all in my head…"

* * *

><p><em>For days, I saw him everywhere I went. I was convinced the coffee barista bore his likeness, I was sure the man who sat next to me on the subway had his eyes, I even briefly saw his face on Jesse's body when we went out for dinner once. Everywhere I looked, I saw Finn Hudson. It was like he was haunting me. <em>

"_Am I going crazy?" I would think. "Do I need to have myself institutionalized?" _

_However, I finally found a distraction: it was the day of the Aida cast list's posting. _

_Jesse dragged me through the streets, pushing and shoving past everyone, even once colliding me with a homeless man pushing a shopping cart. _

"_What the Hell Jesse!" I snapped, brushing myself off and wondering how dirty that guy had been. _

"_Sorry," He mumbled, opening the door to the theatre. _

_I walked slowly down the aisle, while Jesse practically sprinted. He found the list pinned up on the edge of the stage and scanned it quickly. Then, he was back up the aisle and hugging me. "You got it, Rachel! You're the new Aida!"_

* * *

><p>"I knew it!" Ava smiled. "I knew you'd get it! You're such a good singer!"<p>

"Thanks, Ava Bear,"

* * *

><p><em>Weeks passed. I was working hard on Aida and loving my first Broadway experience. It was a perfect distraction and I stopped seeing Finn. In fact, I almost forgot about the day that would've been my high school graduation, until someone from my past showed up. <em>

_I had been at my apartment, cooking a vegan stir fry for dinner and playing classical music on the radio. I was even dancing a little (well, more like swaying). As I put the pan on the stovetop, listening to Sinatra as well as the sizzle, I heard someone ring my doorbell. _

"_Coming," I called, walking to the door. Standing outside was a very familiar crying blonde…_

* * *

><p>Before I could tell anymore, the doorbell rang.<p>

"Sorry," I said, getting up from my spot on the end of my bed to answer it.

Ava sighed. "Can you tell some more when everyone leaves?"

"Let's just focus on getting through tonight, okay?" I laughed. "Can you go check on dinner for me?"

"Yeah," Ava nodded, bounding off to our kitchen.

The doorbell rang again. "I'm coming!" I shouted, stomping over to the door and flinging it open.

"Hey Rachel," Brittany greeted, handing me a bouquet of purple flowers. "These are for the table,"

"Thank you," I said, sniffing them. "They smell divine! Come in, come in!"

"Oh, pretty!" Ava remarked as I handed the flowers to her. She swiftly removed the bow and placed them in a glass vase, which she then filled with water.

"What's for dinner, Berry?" Santana asked.

"Vegan meatballs and pasta with tomato sauce, a light side salad and a loaf of Italian bread from this charming little bakery down the block," I answered.

Santana snorted. "That's the kind of crap you're going to feed my possible fetus? No way, I need real meat!"

"You can suck it up for one night Santana!"

Then the doorbell rang again, and I let Kurt, Blaine and baby Autumn inside.

"How are you guys?" Kurt asked, moving Autumn from one arm to the other. She cooed and rested her head on her father's shoulder.

"We're managing," I laughed. "Santana thinks her possible pregnancy gives her an excuse to be difficult."

"Hormones!" Santana interjected, jutting out her mid section as if a baby bump would suddenly appear. Kurt and Blaine smiled, obviously finding her behavior amusing.

I sent Ava off to set the table and my friends settled on the couch, nitpicking the six o clock news. I sat diligently in front of the oven, watching dinner finish cooking. Then, the doorbell rang one more time, making Autumn start to cry.

Blaine stuck his head in the kitchen, the fussy baby being rocked in his arms. "Do you want me to get that on my way to change her?"

"I'll get it, _Daddy,_" I said, playfully hitting him on the shoulder as I walked past. "Coming!" I called at the door, opening it.

Quinn was there, obviously. She looked very pretty, her blonde hair pulled back away from her face, her makeup simple, and she wore a pale pink silk dress that flowed from her skinny body. "Hi," She said. "Thanks for doing this, Rachel."

"No problem," I dismissed her comment with a wave of my hand. "So where's lover boy?"

"Ummm…parking the car."

"Why are you stuttering?" I asked. "Don't be worried, I'm sure we'll love him!"

"I know you'll love him…" Quinn whispered, her eyes settling at a spot on the floor.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing,"

"I don't think so,"

"Nothing!" She insisted.

"Seriously Quinn, tell me what's wrong."

"NOTHING!" She repeated.

"Lucy Quinn Fabray," I said sternly. "I am your best friend; I know when you are lying to me."

She bit her lip, getting nude lipstick on her teeth. I wiped it away gently. "Rachel, you're not going to be happy with who my boyfriend is."

"But you said I'd love him-"

Before I could finish, the door opened and I gasped. There he was in my doorway, dressed in a suit jacket and a pair of khakis Quinn had clearly forced him into, and having shaved his Mohawk, perhaps also by force.

My voice was shaky as I spoke. "Hello Noah,"


	15. Keeping Secrets

Disclaimer: The only thing I own is Ava.

Author's Note: Thank you all so much for your reviews. It means a lot that you guys like this story. We have 134 reviews and only 14 chapters. That's an average of 9.6 reviews per chapter! You all are so awesome! My goal is 138 reviews for this chapter, but I would love 140. ~Jackie

* * *

><p>"Hello Rachel," He said. "You look nice,"<p>

"Thank you," I was surprised by how calm my tone was. I should've been furious at Quinn for not telling me her boyfriend was Puck; I should've been confronting her for getting with such a douche. But, for some reason, I wasn't mad, just surprised.

I felt Ava appear behind me, her hand grabbing the fabric of my dress and holding on. Puck smiled at her and bent down so they were eye to eye. "This can't be Ava, can it? You've gotten so big! The last time I saw you, you barely measured the size of my hands-"

"Puck," I cut him off. "She doesn't know." I mouthed and Puck nodded, giving me a thumbs-up in understanding.

"How old are you now?" Puck asked Ava, hoping she hadn't thought too much about what she just said. However, I knew from the smirk on my daughter's face that she was thinking of reasons Puck might've seen her as a baby.

"I'm eleven," She told him. "I bet it's been a long time since you saw me, huh?" She gave me a knowing look and grinned devilishly, before walking into the living room to tell her uncles and aunts what had just happened. To say they were surprised was an understatement.

"God, Quinn! How could you leave that detail out?" Kurt had teased, hugging Puck.

"Well, you didn't tell me you had a kid," Puck joked. "So I guess we're even." Blaine punched him lightly in the shoulder and Brittany hugged him to.

"Why didn't you tell me Q?" Santana cried. "Sure, leave the pregnant lady out of the know!"

Puck looked very shocked at what Santana had just said. "Excuse me, did you say pregnant?"

"We don't know if she's preggers yet," Quinn informed him from her spot now in Puck's arms. "But she's been playing it up to make us be nice to her."

Then, Puck burst out laughing.

"What's so funny, Puckerman?" Santana snarled, her hands on her hips.

"You're just not, ummm…the motherly type," Puck remarked through his laughter and soon the rest of us were laughing too, even Brittany.

"Yeah, gang up on the pregnant lady!"

Quinn rolled her eyes. "See what we mean?"

* * *

><p>Shockingly, dinner went well. Despite the grumbling about my vegan food, no one left the table hungry; conversation flowed easily.<p>

"Would anyone like dessert?" I asked as I cleared the plates.

"Err, is it vegan?" Blaine asked. "Cause if it is, I'm stuffed…"

"It's cheesecake."

"Oh, then I'll have some of that!" Santana proclaimed, dropping her napkin on the table and rubbing her stomach in satisfaction.

"God, you people need to keep your minds open to new things," I sighed. "Ava, will you help me with the clean up please?"

"Sure Mom," My daughter answered, taking some of the plates and following me into the kitchen. As she helped me load everything into the dishwasher, she whispered: "Is Puck my dad?"

"Do you want me to answer that question?"

"Err, no. Sorry Mom."

"No problem babe. You want me to tell you some more of the story when everyone leaves?"

"Duh!" Ava said and I laughed.

"Oh, I'll be right back, I forgot the silverware." I said, heading back towards the dining room. But, I stopped suddenly when I heard a quiet conversation coming from the room, my name being mentioned a few times. I could only hear parts of it and decided to stop and listen.

"…I want to see him!" Puck was saying. "He's my friend!"

"…quiet!" Brittany told him. "We don't want to upset Rachel!"

"…Rachel?" Puck remarked, I still couldn't hear. "So he's…" The next part was too low for me to make it out.

"Yes!" Blaine said. Kurt said something too, but I didn't hear any of it.

"Wait, Finn?" Quinn whispered, and I perked up. What about Finn? "Sam…Jesse is…" I figured Quinn was telling Puck about Sam being Santana and Brittany's sperm donor, and she had to be mentioning that Jesse was on Broadway now. But, what was she saying about Finn? I had to know. Was there something my friends weren't telling me?

"Don't mention it to anyone!" Santana snapped.

"Your secret's safe with me," Puck answered firmly. "I swear,"

"You better," The Latina laughed.

Stunned and confused I returned to the kitchen, having forgotten the silverware. Were my friends…_lying to me?_

* * *

><p>"Hey Quinn, can I talk to you?" I asked my best friend as everyone else left for the night. Only Puck and she remained.<p>

The blonde turned to her boyfriend, who shrugged. "I'll go pull the car up to the curb," He said, mumbling polite goodbyes to me and Ava before leaving.

"Ava, why don't you go get ready for bed?" I instructed the eleven year old. "I'll be there in just a minute."

Ava nodded and left the room silently, obviously sensing that I wanted to be alone with Quinn.

"Rachel, I am so sorry." Quinn whimpered. "But when we met up again I couldn't help myself."

"I'm not mad at you," I stated.

Quinn looked up. "Really?"

"Why would I be mad at you? I'm a little confused by your choice after all he's put you through, but if you're happy, so am I. You are happy, right?"

"Of course I am," Quinn assured me. "I really love Puck, he's a changed man."

I patted my friend's arm. "Well, then I wish you nothing but the best,"

* * *

><p>After Quinn left with Puck, I went to Ava's room to tell her some more story before bed.<p>

"I heard you talking to Auntie Quinn," She told me. "What did Puck do to her?"

"I'm actually just getting to that part," I said, lying down next to her on the bed. "So, someone was at my door…"

* * *

><p>"<em>Quinn?" I asked. "Why are you here in New York?" <em>

_She sniffed, another tear falling down her face. "Can I come in?" I nodded, helping Quinn inside and settling her down on the couch. I turned off the music and sat next to her. _

"_Now, what's wrong? Why'd you come here?" I asked. _

"_You're going to be mad at me." Quinn cried. "You'll probably hate me and never speak to me again and…" She broke off with a sob. _

"_I swear I won't hate you," I promised her. "I'd never kick you out in your time of need." _

"_After you left…I started dating Puck," Quinn confessed and I felt like for a moment my heart had stopped. "Things were going so well, but then…" Another sob. "Without you the glee club lost Nationals and…Puck, Puck cheated on me with Lauren Zizes." Another sob. "I found them making out in the janitor's closet after graduation. And so I dumped him and took the first flight here. I can't go back to Lima, I just can't." _

"_Awww, honey." I soothed, cradling Quinn's head against my chest. "I am so sorry he did that to you, and feel free to stay here as long as you want." _

"_Thank you, Rachel." _

"_You're welcome." _

_And that's how I became friends with Quinn Fabray. _

* * *

><p><strong>Review! What do you think the guys are hiding from Rachel? Let me know! <strong>


	16. Rings And Photographs

Disclaimer: Do I even have to say it? All I own is Ava!

Author's Note: Review, review, review, review!...Please? We're at 148; my goal for this chapter is 158. So please review! Who do you think Ava's dad is, who you think it isn't, who do you want it to be? ~Jackie PS: Sorry for not updating in ages, I started this on my mom's computer and just never had the time (or the energy, honestly) to get it off.

* * *

><p>"So, I let Quinn stay at my apartment and we quickly became best friends. It was like the Quinn Fabray I used to know was someone totally different. She was happier, nicer, sweeter," I explained.<p>

"Well, I'm glad you and Auntie Quinn became friends," Ava told me. "So, what happened next?"

* * *

><p><em>As we sat on my couch, me comforting Quinn as she held a pillow and a package of tissues against her chest and drinking the cup of hot tea I'd brought her, I decided to ask her about what was going on back home in Lima. <em>

"_Kurt's coming up next week, but I'm sure you already know that." She began. "He and Blaine wanted to spend some quality time together before they were separated for a year. And guess what? Brittany got a scholarship to this really prestigious dance academy in New York, so her and Santana are moving down here in a few weeks." Quinn smiled and so did I, it was like she had completely forgotten about the pain she'd been in a moment before. "Won't it be fun, Rachel? All of us taking on New York together?" _

_I squeezed Quinn's hand. "Yeah, yeah it will," I paused and met the pair of hazel eyes staring at me. _

"_Is something wrong, Rachel?" Quinn asked, concern creeping into her voice. _

"_No, it's just…" I thought of how to phrase my question without sounding like a stalker. "What's up with Sam, and Finn?" _

_Quinn looked down at her cup of tea nervously and began to play with her spoon, making swirls in the drink. "I don't know where Sam is," She confessed. "He left before graduation, took his diploma and ditched I guess. I didn't get a chance to say goodbye or anything, but I heard a rumor he went down to his parents' house and told them he was leaving. Like, forever," Quinn frowned. "I saw Mary Evans on my way out of town, and she looked really depressed. She didn't even make eye contact with me." _

_I gulped. "What about Finn?" _

_Quinn bit her lip, she looked like she might cry. "He's gone too, Rachel." She told me sadly. "He broke up with that new girlfriend of his suddenly, who I didn't like whatsoever anyway, and enlisted, even though we all told him not to. He had to fly out for training right after graduation. Me, Kurt, Blaine, Brittany, Santana, Tina, Mike and Puck were all there at the airport to say goodbye. I left right after he did, like I said before it was kind of a spur of the moment thing. I guess I just felt like there wasn't anything left for me in Lima anymore, you know?" _

"_I know," I said. "Because I felt the same way," _

"_I heard about you and Sam, Rachel." Quinn blurted out, tears in her eyes. She reached into her pocket and pulled out something: the ring Finn had used to propose to me with. "Finn gave this to me before he left, he said he trusted me with it, he trusted I'd find a way to give it to you." A drop of wetness fell down Quinn's face as her tears began to make a reappearance. But this time she wasn't weeping dramatically like a heartbroken girl, she was quiet, calm, solemn. "I think you did the right thing, not marrying him. I understand how awful, and conflicted, you must feel. I've felt that way plenty of times before." Quinn slid the ring onto my palm and I closed my fingers around it, pressing so tightly I swore the jewel would make an imprint on my skin. "But you will always love him," Quinn finished. "And deny it or not, like it or not, he will always be your soul mate. Not mine, or that girl's, or anyone else's." _

_I nodded, because I knew Quinn was absolutely right. _

* * *

><p>I didn't realize I was crying at the memory until Ava reached out and dried my cheek. "It's okay," She comforted me, resting her head against my chest. "That was a long time ago, it's over,"<p>

"It's never over," I whispered without thinking. Ava smiled and scribbled my words down on her notepad. I wiped my eyes and stood up. "Bed time, Ava Bear,"

Ava put the notepad back on her nightstand and climbed under her blankets. "Hey Mom?"

"Yes sweetie?"

"Do you think I could have some pictures of the four?" She asked. "Just so I could know what they looked like?"

"…Sure," I said, once again not thinking. "You still have that picture of Jesse from after your dream, so I'll go get photos of the rest of them. Wait right here," I went back to the hall closet and got the same cardboard box down. I opened the scrapbook again and flipped through it, looking for my favorite photographs of Finn, Sam and Puck. Then, I found the perfect one. It was me, Finn, Puck, Sam and Quinn on the streets of New York. I remembered that photo, we'd been at Nationals, junior year, and I'd asked Mr. Schue to take it for me. Smiling, I brought it back to Ava.

Ava grinned as I handed her the photo. She studied it for a brief moment, and then propped it up on her nightstand. "That sucks," She said to herself.

"What?" I asked as I turned off the light.

Ava shrugged. "I don't really look like any of them, now that I think about it."

"Well, I guess you just inherited your mother's good looks."

At this statement, Ava laughed.

* * *

><p>Review? And sorry, once again.<p> 


	17. Metaphors In The Clouds

Disclaimer: I only own Ava and the plot. Everything else belongs to Glee and FOX.

Author's Note: I know, I know, I'm horrible! I started to write this and then I couldn't find it, so when I came to finish it I had no idea where the beginning was, so I had to rewrite it. Sorry, I know I suck! My friends, Jessie and Stephanie, who I share the account with, have been pestering me for weeks about who the dad is. They're like: "Who's the dad?" And I'm like: "What the-OH! THAT! I'm not telling you!" And they're like: "Jackie, we know you. It's obviously Finn." And I'm like: "Maybe…" And they're like: "It's Finn. You're too big of a Finchel fan for it to not be Finn." But is it Finn? Well, if you want to find out, keeping reading! Please drop a review if you don't mind! Thanks for being so patient with me! ~Jackie

* * *

><p>Summer began two weeks later, much to everyone's relief. I was ready to have some free time and just be able to spend it with my family and friends. Being a teacher, I adored the summer time, even through the sweltering heat and busted air conditioning in my apartment (which, Puck soon volunteered to fix, much to my relief).<p>

June 22nd. Ava and I were planning to go for a walk in Central Park. I was looking for my iPod when Ava told me someone was at the door. It was Santana.

"Hey Rachel," She said. Was it just me, or was Santana Lopez actually…smiling?

"Hi," I replied, confused. I turned to Ava. "Will you give me and Auntie Santana some privacy, please?"

Ava nodded. As soon as she left the room, Santana blurted out: "I'm pregnant."

"Really?" I gasped. "Oh my God, Santana, that's amazing!" I couldn't believe it. Normally it took women months, even years to get pregnant, but it took Santana less than a month. "I'm going to hug you now, okay?" And for once in my life, when I hugged her, Santana didn't try to kill me afterwards. That was what that baby had already done for her.

"Thanks," Santana said.

"Brittany excited?"

Santana laughed. "That's the understatement of the decade."

"Well, is that all you wanted to say?"

"Err, no." Santana paused, as if considering how to continue. "Quinn and Puck are going back to Lima for a week, to see Puck's mom. She told me to ask you if you wanted her to give a message to anyone…" She trailed off there, drawing circles on her stomach.

I knew instantly she meant Finn. Of course she meant Finn. He was the only one she could mean, right? Sam, Puck and Jesse were all in New York. "Do you mean…?"

"Finn?" She cut me off. "Yeah, I guess so." She paused. "I mean, I don't even know if he'll be there, but like she could always tell his mom to let him know…" She trailed off and I had a feeling she told me something she wasn't supposed to.

I thought about it for a moment. "I only want her to tell him if she sees him, okay? If he's not there she shouldn't bother, okay?" Santana nodded. "Tell him…tell him I love him."

Santana smiled faintly. "You got it."

* * *

><p>When Ava and I got to the park, she immediately began questioning me. "So, is Auntie Santana pregnant?"<p>

I laughed at her straightforwardness. "Yes."

Ava smiled. "I'm really happy for her, for her and Auntie Brittany." She sighed, plopping down on the blanket and closing her eyes, her arms spread out about her head. "Will you tell me some more of the story? You haven't told me some in a long time."

"Okay," I replied, taking a sip from a water bottle and lying down. I got in the same position as my daughter and realized it was much more comfortable than it looked. "So, where did I leave off?"

"Auntie Quinn," Ava answered automatically. "And she gave you Finn's ring and told you you'd always love him. And you thought she was right."

I nodded. "Of course. So, what happened next was…"

* * *

><p><em>The next day, I put that ring on my finger. I told myself it would be just to see how it felt on, how it looked on me, but after that, I didn't want to take it off. It reminded me of Finn, and knowing I might never see him again, I decided to keep it on. <em>

_Honestly, it looked quite natural there. It wasn't really the ring that mattered, it was the fact that it was Finn's. Maybe I was meant to be with Finn, and maybe I wasn't, but right then I just wanted to hold onto that little piece of him. I didn't see any harm in it. _

_I was thrilled when I got to see Kurt again, especially because he understood how it felt to be without Finn, since they were brothers…_

* * *

><p>"Wait," Ava interrupted. "Uncle Kurt is Finn's brother?" She had a quizzical look on her face, one eyebrow raised and nose scrunched up.<p>

"Yeah, well, stepbrothers. Finn's mom married Kurt's dad when they were in high school. You didn't know that? I thought I said it."

"No," Ava told me. "You didn't. So Uncle Kurt may actually be my uncle. Hmmm," She laid back down and got back into her position. "Okay, keep going, please."

* * *

><p>"<em>I miss him, of course." Kurt had said when I'd asked him. "He's my brother and now he's far away in military training." He gave me a small smile. "I see that ring on your finger, Rachel. I'm not blind." I blushed and felt my cheeks grow hot. "So, are you guys engaged or what? Are you going to be my sister anytime soon?" <em>

_I looked down sheepishly. "No. Didn't you hear about the Sam thing?" _

_Now it was Kurt's turn to blush. "Uh, yeah. Quinn told me. But I didn't think it was true." _

"_Well, it is." I whispered. "I'm a complete and total slut." _

_Kurt shook his head. "You're not a slut Rachel. You're a great girl." I shrugged and wiped my eyes, causing Kurt to hug me. "You know," He mumbled. "Engaged or not, you've always been a sister to me." _

_I smiled. "And you've always been my brother." _

* * *

><p>"That's so sweet." Ava sighed, opening her eyes. "I really liked that part."<p>

"I like that part too." I said. "Uncle Kurt is pretty awesome, isn't he?"

"He is," Ava replied, looking up. She pointed to one of the big, fluffy clouds floating by. "Am I the only one who thinks that looks like a bunny?"

I tilted my head and studied it for a second. "You know, it kind of does." I pointed out another. "That one looks like cotton candy, doesn't it?"

Ava shrugged. "I think it's more like a cotton swab." She identified another. "That looks like a marshmallow."

"More like a blob!" I laughed. Really, the cloud was just a huge clump.

"Hey," Ava said, her gesturing in the direction of a very oddly shaped cloud. "That one looks like…" She trailed off when she saw the look on my face, lying back down and closing her eyes again.

Sure enough, this cloud had a very distinct shape. It was a little fuzzy around the edges and wasn't perfect, but everyone could see the letters it seemed to form. This cloud looked like an intertwined 'F' and 'R'.

I laid back and watched the cloud move across the blue sky. Slowly, the letters began to separate, each one getting more and more out of shape with each small movement. It was like some big metaphor, staring me right in the face. Finally, after several torturous seconds, it just disappeared altogether.

* * *

><p>I didn't really like that chapter, but hey. Give me some ideas, if you have any! Also, if there are any typos in this, I apologize but I'm watching <em>The Glee Project <em>with my mom and I have to go to bed soon anyway so I didn't proofread it. Please review!


	18. Future Ambitions

Disclaimer: I only own Ava…yadda yadda yadda…

Author's Note: So, here's an update! Give me any ideas you have, because I'm honestly making up the story as I go along. ~Jackie

* * *

><p><em>I opened up my umbrella and Santana leaned in closer to me, so we could both be shielded from the rain. Since it was her first day in New York and Brittany had a meeting with one of her professors at the dance academy, she'd offered to walk down to the theater with me; neither of us knew it was going to start pouring. <em>

"_Please tell me it doesn't rain like this all the time," Santana said, doing the buttons on her poncho. _

"_It doesn't," I assured her, ducking under the scaffold over the sidewalk. People brushed past us, some with only newspapers above their heads to keep them dry, and taxis drove by, their headlights flashing red. "But I think New York is pretty in the rain," _

_Santana snorted. "Maybe in photos, but not when you're actually getting wet."_

"_You want a coffee?" I asked, pointing to a Starbucks on the next corner. "I've got time,"_

"_Sure," She replied, before asking: "Is there one of these on every street here?" _

_I laughed. "Kind of," And honestly, there were more Starbucks' in New York City than I'd ever seen in my entire life. I closed our umbrella and opened the door. "After you," Santana stepped in and I followed, closing the door behind me. I placed the umbrella in the rack and then followed Santana to the counter. _

"_What's good?" She asked, surveying the menu. _

"_Well, if you want something that tastes like what you get at the Lima Bean then just get their strongest brew…" I answered, continuing to explain everything from the distinction between a cappuccino and a latte to the sizes of a tall, a grande and a venti. And honestly, after all of that, I don't even remember what we got to drink. Something caramel for Santana and something extra strong for me, I think. _

"_So, what are your plans?" I asked Santana as we continued to walk to the theater. _

_Santana looked up from her drink, whipped cream smudged on her upper lip. "For what?" She questioned. _

"_Uh, you have a little something," I mumbled, gesturing to the spot on my mouth where the whipped cream was. _

_She reached up and wiped the cream off, then licked her fingers. "Thanks," _

_I shrugged. "I mean like, for your future. Brittany's going to be a dancer, what about you?" _

_Santana sighed. "Berry, you're killing me here…" She paused to take another sip of her…whatever it was. "I've been thinking of applying to Tisch School of the Arts." She said finally. "But I don't know if I'd get in..." _

"_Really?" I said. "Santana, that's awesome. Of course you'll get in! Drama department, right?" _

"_Yeah," She nodded. "But I always thought you'd be the one to get into…" She trailed off and took a big sip of her drink. "Uh, sorry, I know you're on Broadway with St. James now and everything…" _

"…_I do kind of want to go to school," I confessed. "I've been considering looking into something online." _

"_I think you should," Santana told me as she stopped outside the theater. I stepped out from under the umbrella and ducked under the doorframe. "I believe in you, Berry. We all do," _

"_Thanks, Santana," I said, and then I went inside. _

* * *

><p>"<em>Hey Jesse," I said casually as I set my bag down on one of the theater seats. <em>

"_You're late," He replied, unamused. _

_I looked at the clock. "It's only nine right now," I informed him. "I'm right on time." _

"_I told you to come ten minutes early!" Jesse sighed as if this was common knowledge and I was an idiot for not knowing. "We need to make sure you have perfect pitch in 'Elaborate Lives' so you don't make a fool of yourself." _

"_My pitch is fine!" I retorted, crossing my arms. "No one has a problem with it besides you," _

"_Well, I want you to be your best at all times," Jesse said, trying to lean in to kiss me. I took a step back, indignant. He huffed. "You're being unreasonable; I'm doing this because I care about you," _

"_You're putting too much pressure on me!" I cried. Then, I added: "I want to go to college."Jesse raised an eyebrow then started to laugh. "What's so funny?" _

"_You can't be on Broadway and go to college!" Jesse chortled. "Oh, Rachel, that was a good one but let's be serious and get to work-"_

"_I am being serious," I cut him off. "And your attitude is not appreciated!" Then, I turned on my heel and stomped out of the theater. _

"_Where are you going?" Jesse called after me. _

"_Home, you asshole!" _

* * *

><p>"I hope Jesse isn't my dad," Ava said as I flipped pancakes. We were at Quinn's apartment and I was making breakfast while we helped them pack for Lima. "He's really not very nice,"<p>

I opened my mouth to agree, when the front door opened. "Almost done," Puck said, coming in to steal some of the chocolate chips.

"Hey!" I cried, playfully hitting him on the arm with a dish towel. "Do you want pancakes or not, mister?"

He held up in his hands in surrender. "It was just a couple!" He said in his defense, but his mouth was full, proving him wrong.

"Yeah, right!" I laughed. "And you're all sweaty, Noah, it's gross."

Puck stuck his tongue out at me like a bratty child, then wiped some of his perspiration onto my arm before running out of the room. I cringed, while Ava burst out laughing.

Then the door opened and in walked Quinn, dressed in a tiny tank top and tight sweatpants, and…Sam?

"Thanks for coming," Quinn was saying to him. "It's really helpful to have an extra hand,"

"It was no problem," Sam responded. "Plus, I heard there was going to be food." They both laughed.

"Yeah, that's right," I said, exiting the kitchen. They both stopped to look up at me. I turned to Sam. "I'm making chocolate chip pancakes; if you want some feel free to help yourself."

He nodded. "Thanks, Rachel."

I turned to Quinn. "Quinn, can I speak to you for a second? I just need a…uh, a spatula."

"What about the one in your hand?" Quinn asked, pointing down to the pancake batter coated spatula I had been unknowingly holding onto.

I put my hands behind my back. "Uh, what spatula?" Quinn gave me a 'what is wrong with you look' and Sam was clearly holding back laughter. I grabbed my best friend's arm and dragged her into the kitchen. "Why did you invite him?" I asked.

"I needed help and he offered!" Quinn whispered in response. "Quiet down, he'll hear you!"

"I don't care if he hears me!" I repeated, but I lowered my voice anyway. "So you're dating one of my exes and becoming best buddies with my other? What are you going to start a book club with Jesse next?"

"Never!" Quinn gasped. "Rachel, I wouldn't do that to you!"

"But you'd bring Sam over when you knew I was here?" I said. "You know I can't stand him, Quinn. Not since…"

"I know!" She cut me off. "I'm sorry if this makes you uncomfortable, but you need to get over it!"

"I can't get over it!" I cried. "That's not something you get over!"

"I said I was sorry, okay?" Quinn repeated. "Don't be mad at me,"

"I'm not mad at you Quinn," I assured her. "Now, can you please tell Ava to-" I looked over to the kitchen table. Ava wasn't sitting there anymore. "Oh crap," I stormed into the family room, Quinn at my heels. Sam was lying on the couch, Ava sitting near him.

"My mom is telling me about my dad," Ava said.

Sam looked surprised by this. "Does this mean Rachel is telling you about what happened in the emergency room?"

"Sam!" I gasped and they both looked at me.

Ava's face fell. "Mommy…" She said, her lower lip trembling. "My dad's not dead, is he?"

Quinn and Sam exchanged a shocked look and I really didn't know what to say. "No, sweetie," I assured her. "Your father is not dead…"

"Then what happened in the emergency room?" She asked, tears in her eyes. "Mommy, what happened?"

I didn't know what to say. "Sweetie, it's complicated-"

Ava shook her head. "I knew it, I knew it!" And then she ran out of the room sobbing.

For a moment, it was silent. I felt frozen in place. Finally, Sam said, "Wow."

"I'm sorry," I said. "I have to go,"

"Then go,"

With that, I ran after her.

* * *

><p>Like it? Then review!<p> 


	19. Surprises Pt 1

Disclaimer: Ava is all I own.

Author's Note: Ideas, ideas, ideas! I really need them! This one's short, sorry. ~Jackie

* * *

><p>I found Ava curled up on Quinn's bed, crying. "Ava, sweetie!" I said, sitting down and hugging her close. She grabbed onto my shirt, which was covered in pancake batter, and sobbed into it. "I'll tell you everything right now if you want me to. I'll-" Only then did I realize I was crying too.<p>

"No," Ava shook her head. "No, it's okay. I understand. You thought this would be a nice way to tell me a sad story…" She sniffed. "Do you have any happy parts you could tell me? That would be nice."

I gave her shoulder a squeeze. "I most certainly can,"

* * *

><p><em>I was walking home from the theater after an extremely long, hard day of rehearsals. Jesse was still adamant that I couldn't do both the show and attend school, but I didn't let him stop me. Santana and I filled out our applications to Tisch and sent them in together. Now we simply waited. Well, Santana waited. I worked and dealt with Jesse's constant nagging. <em>

_So, when I was getting onto the subway that day, I got a call from Kurt. I decided a chat with him would help me relax so I picked up. Yeah, I was wrong. _

_"Hey Kurt," I said. "What's up?" _

"_Well," He replied, and I knew instantly something was up. "I have a surprise for you, Rachel." _

"_What?" I asked. _

_There was a long pause and I bit my lip as I waited for Kurt to speak. "…How much do you love me?" He said finally, accompanied by a nervous laugh. _

"_Kurt," I said, really worried now. "What did you do?" Honestly, I was dreading the answer. _

"_I didn't do a bad thing!" He assured me, talking fast. "In fact, it's good. I think it's good. I just don't know how you'll feel about it…" _

"_Listen to me, Kurt Elizabeth Hummel!" I hissed into the phone. I heard Kurt make a small, pained noise at the use of his full name. "Tell me whatever the Hell you did right this instant! You know I hate surprises!" In response, I got only static. "Kurt?" I said. "Hello?"_

"_Rachel?" I heard Kurt say, static cutting him off in between syllables. "Rachel, are you there?" _

"_I'm on the subway, you're breaking up!" I sighed into the receiver. _

"..._Rachel?" Kurt's voice was so warped and distorted I could barely understand him. Then, the call dropped and I heard nothing at all except for my phone's loud beeping. _

_God, I _hated_ surprises. _

* * *

><p>"What was Uncle Kurt's surprise?" Ava asked. "Something good, right?"<p>

"Yes," I said. "I was pleasantly surprised when I got home. You see, what happened was-"

I was then cut off when I heard a scream from the kitchen. I looked at Ava, who's puffy eyes were wide, and we both raced over to the kitchen.

Quinn was the source of the screaming. She sat on the counter, legs pulled up to her chest, hands over her mouth. Sam was frantically pouring water on the stove, but he had bad aim and was getting it all over Quinn's kitchen floor.

Damn pancakes.

Finally, the smoke cleared and Quinn stopped shrieking. I felt a hand on my shoulder and saw Puck. "Tough break, Berry," He said.

I shrugged. "They're just pancakes,"

Quinn fanned her face. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry for that little panic attack. Last time I burnt something I nearly set the kitchen on fire." She blushed while Puck laughed, and so I decided not to ask.

Then the door opened. Brittany skipped in first, her blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail and dressed in a T-shirt and yoga pants. Santana walked in behind her with a crabby facial expression. She kept both hands on her middle and I could see why she was so grumpy, her body was bloated and her face was a light shade of green. She surveyed the room, her brow wrinkled as she thought. "So…what did we miss?"

* * *

><p>This is so short, I know, so give me ideas! Also, review!<p> 


	20. Surprises Pt 2

Disclaimer: I don't own _Glee_ or _Definitely, Maybe_. I do own Ava.

Author's Note: We had reached 200+ reviews! That's awesome, guys! Thank you all for reading and reviewing! I this one is also short; however the next chapter will be longer. I simply wanted to end this one on a cliffhanger. ~Jackie

* * *

><p>Quinn told me and Ava to go home after that. So we said our goodbyes and left, we wouldn't have been much help anyway. When we were back at the apartment, Ava immediately began begging me to keep telling the story.<p>

"Sure," I said. "But breakfast first, since the last attempt went horribly!"

Ava giggled. "How about just cereal this time?"

"Oh, definitely,"

* * *

><p>"<em>Kurt!" I called out as I walked into his apartment. "Kurt, where are you?" Instead of being met by Kurt, however, it was Santana who stepped in front of me. <em>

"_Rachel," She said. "Before you go back there-"_

"_What's going on, Santana?" I asked, my hands on my hips. "Tell me now, or I'll go find out for myself." _

"_Rachel, seriously!" Santana hissed, grabbing one of my wrists and wrapping her fingers tightly around it. "Rachel, please, just let me talk to you-"_

"_What is going on?" I said, pleading. "Please, Santana," _

_She looked down and blinked. "It's good," She said finally. "I just don't know how you're going to feel about it…"_

_I groaned. "Oh, why does everyone keep saying that to me? Just let me find out for myself!" _

"_Not yet!" She retorted, the Santana fiery personality I was used to flashing in her eyes. "Rachel, Kurt wouldn't have done this if he could've gotten around it, because he knew, we all knew, that it could go one way or the other: it could hurt you terribly or made you incredibly happy. And none of us wanted to take that chance. But…but _he_ came and there was nothing we could do and we wanted to see him before he-"_

_I cut her off once I felt my breathing go back to normal. "He?" I gasped. My voice still sounded a little weird, like I'd been crying or something. "Santana, who is in the living room..." I knew instantly it was one of the three, but I never really thought about it more than that. I never thought about what seeing any of them would do to me. I never thought to leave…and part of me is still glad, to this day, that I didn't. _

"_Rachel," Santana began, but I'd already shoved my way past her and into Kurt's tiny living room. Quinn sat in the chair, while Brittany sat Indian style at her feet. Kurt was on the couch, and _he_ was next to him. I let out a small, choked sound. _

_His gaze shifted to me and our eyes met. He gave me a small, half smile. I wondered what he was thinking, if he was happy to see me or…or not. I wouldn't have blamed him if I was the last person he wanted to see. _

"_Rachel," He said. At least, I think it was him who said it, as I watched his lips form my name. I felt like I was shaking as I took him in, everything from his cropped hair to his Army boots. _

"_Finn," _

* * *

><p>So yeah, this one is really, really short but the next chapter will be much longer and out very, very soon…and why do I keep saying words twice? Whatever, please review, lovelies!<p> 


	21. Things Just Got Complicated

Disclaimer: Guess what I own? Nothing but Ava? Ding ding ding, you win! Your prize? This chapter.

Author's Note: So, I cannot even begin to say how sorry I am. I have had the worst writer's block in the history of writer's block, and no motivation whatsoever. So, please do not yell at me in the reviews. I'm a very busy girl right now. Be thankful that I forced myself to sit down and write this. I honestly have no idea where this story is going, so if you have any ideas as to what you think should happen, please tell me in either a review or a private message, because I want to finish. I will try to update The Next Generation as soon as I can crank another chapter out. Once again, my apologies. ~Jackie

* * *

><p><em>"Do you want us to leave you alone?" Quinn asked. <em>

_"No," I said, at the same time Finn said, "Yes." _

_"We have a lot to talk about, Rachel," Finn remarked, and I wrung my hands. _

_"You're right," I sighed, unable to look at him. "You're right." I repeated. _

_Quinn, Brittany and Kurt backed out of the room, while Santana stayed in place for a long moment. "Santana," Finn mumbled, his eyes begging her to please give us some privacy. _

_She shook her head and turned to me. I knew she was waiting for me to speak. "It's okay, Santana," I assured her, and she frowned as she left the room. I looked up at Finn, who smiled a lopsided grin at me. "I missed you," He said. _

_"You left me," I blurted out. _

_Finn frowned and rubbed the back of his neck. "It's not like I had much of a choice," He said finally. _

_"Yes you did." _

_There was a pause, and then Finn patted the spot next to him. "Sit down," He said. "So we can talk," _

_I obeyed orders, pressing my body up against Finn's. He was warm as he wrapped a strong arm around my shoulder, pulling me close and pressing a kiss into my hair. "I love you," He whispered. "I always have. But, after you cheated on me with Sam, I knew I couldn't be around you without getting hurt." _

_"I'm sorry," I told him, wishing I could just move away but not finding the strength to leave Finn's embrace. "I love you, I do. Do you know how much I regret that? How much I regret hurting you like I did?" I felt myself tear up, and I tried to fit it, but in the end I just couldn't and I started to cry for what felt like the millionth time since I lost Finn. "I lost you," I sobbed. "And it's all because of something stupid I did," _

_"…Maybe you didn't lose me," Finn said. I looked up at him, my eyes watery and my vision partially blocked. "At least not yet," _

_Then I crashed my lips against his, my salty tears mixing into the kiss. His lips were soft, smooth, just like I remembered. I had Finn back for the night. _

* * *

><p><em>When I woke up in the morning, we were in Finn's hotel room, him lying beside me, on his stomach. I reached out a hand and rubbed his back, pulling the sheet off and draw circles with my finger. As I got to his one shoulder blade, I saw something that hadn't been there before, three letters inked on the skin: 214. <em>

_"That's your flight number," _

_I looked to Finn's face; apparently I had woken him up. Our eyes met. "What?" _

_He smiled at me. "The flight you took to New York? The one I tried to prevent you from getting on? That was Flight Number 214." _

_I frowned, but not because I was unhappy. Honestly, that was the sweetest thing anyone had ever done for me. Finn had gotten a permanent reminder of me etched onto him, to be there forever. "…Thank you," I said. _

_"You're welcome?" He laughed, as if he was unsure of what to say next. _

_Finally, I asked: "How long are you here for?" _

_Finn shrugged. "A little while, I opted to go to Saint John's instead of being sent to a military base. I still have some time to change my mind, but I don't think I'm going to; I'm going to stay right here with you." _

_I moved forward, so our noses touched, and kissed him. Then, we both fell back asleep, just like that._

_When I woke up again, Finn was gone. His side of the bed was cold. _

* * *

><p><em>A few weeks later, I went to lunch with Kurt. "So," He said. "Your opening night is tomorrow. How does it feel?" <em>

_"How does what feel?" I asked, taking a bite of my salad. _

_"To know that in just over twenty four hours you'll be making your Broadway debut," He explained. _

_"Oh," I said, thinking about it. "Good, I guess. Even if I am really pissed at Jesse right now…" I shrugged; I wasn't going to let Jesse St. James stand in my way. _

_"I'm proud of you," Kurt said. "We're all proud of you," _

_"Speaking of all," I remarked. "Didn't you say Quinn was going to come with us today?" _

_Kurt looked down and I saw him blush. "She wasn't feeling well…it's that time of the month for her, I think." _

_"…Oh," I said. _

_It was only then I realized that my own period hadn't come. I was late. _

* * *

><p>"I knew it!" Ava cried, excitement on her face. "Finn's my dad, isn't he? You were pregnant with me!"<p>

I looked down, trying to think of how to break the news to Ava. "Sweetie…" I began. "That baby wasn't you,"

* * *

><p>Dun dun dun! Review? Like I said, I need ideas. What do you think is going to happen? Also, if anyone here reads The Next Generation I will be writing the next chapter of that when I can find the time. Thanks!<p> 


End file.
